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Ghetto Symphony (Lyric) by anonymous
Chaotic crescendo builds on desolate stage as the players sing their sin Classical orchestrated crying as no one ever loses or wins Percussion gunshots boom bass through cities where air is thin The ghetto symphony begins Mothers shouting to "bad" kids making clanging symbals break Ailing elders create winded sighs as their last breath they take Teenage heartbeats strum acoustics while passionate love they make Man-made chemicals induce rhapsody as syringes numb old aches The harmony of concrete meeting roses plays a tragic song There is the rhythm of happy children's feet who somehow don't belong The ghetto symphony sounds on Alcoholic melodies drown grown men's frustration Broadcasters string cacophonies of the "hood's" desolation Political conductors excusing social obligation Gentle tipping, tapping direction would stop community obliteration A treble cleff of despair pervades a starless sky As a pervert steals a young girl's notes And a younger boy gets high Educators, a bit off key and in a foreign meter, teach To inner-city children who our forefathers didn't reach Musicians ignore angelic instruction that the divine Composer sends Instruments lack purpose The ghetto symphony ends

Up the ladder: Broken Tomarrow
Down the ladder: Words

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 3.7142856
Weighted score: 4.654218
Overall Rank: 12276
Posted: October 18, 2002 2:42 PM PDT; Last modified: October 18, 2002 2:42 PM PDT
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Comments:
[10] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 18-Oct-02/2:49 PM | Reply
horus8 GOLDEN CUE-TIP AWARD ON THIS FINE OCTOBER DAY. can i play the triangle? 10.
[n/a] anonymous @ 138.23.59.234 > horus8 | 18-Oct-02/3:41 PM | Reply
Thank-you. However, I don't know if you want to be in this symphony.
[6] Tintagiles @ 142.166.241.105 | 18-Oct-02/2:49 PM | Reply
Not bad as a series of musical images. Don't know if you tried to put the poem in sonata-allegro form -- it sounds like that a little, but if so it needs work.
[n/a] anonymous @ 138.23.59.234 > Tintagiles | 18-Oct-02/3:39 PM | Reply
No special form attempted. Not that I even know what sonata-allegro even is. I just write. I'd like to be familiar with this term though.
[6] Tintagiles @ 142.166.241.105 > anonymous | 18-Oct-02/3:51 PM | Reply
Sonata-allegro is the basic form of the first movement of a Classical symphony, that's all. It basically goes: Introduction (if you want), Theme A, transition to Theme B, Theme B, then the Development, in which you play around with these two themes, and then the recapitulation, in which Theme A is played again, generally in a different key. You can then add a Coda if you want. Poems written like that are fun and far too rare.
[n/a] anonymous @ 138.23.59.234 > Tintagiles | 18-Oct-02/4:34 PM | Reply
Thanx for the info
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