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#3 (Haiku) by mikejedw
This damp soil, chocolate frosting on the floating world-- ants in the garden.

Up the ladder: Timing
Down the ladder: Jeff

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Arithmetic Mean: 5.785714
Weighted score: 5.5744033
Overall Rank: 2409
Posted: May 13, 2002 7:10 AM PDT; Last modified: May 13, 2002 7:10 AM PDT
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Comments:
[7] lilli @ 134.226.1.158 | 23-May-02/2:31 AM | Reply
Hey -- this isn't half bad! I think "floating world" is a cliche, though, as well as being scentifically inaccurate (poetry doesn't give you a licence you know..)
[3] -=SeTTle=- @ 63.214.98.27 | 30-Jul-02/8:23 PM | Reply
who/gives/a shit about ants/profundity through obscurity/always a sign of/unclear thought/according to neitzsche and common/sen/se.
[n/a] mikejedw @ | 30-Jul-02/10:20 PM | Reply
Obscurity? The idea of the "floating world" is a foundation of Buddhist mythology. Plus, I'm riffing on one of the world's most famous haiku, by Issa: "In this world/we walk on the roof of hell/gazing at flowers." Oh, and Nietzsche was beloved by the Nazis, so pick your heroes wisely. Hey, it ain't a great haiku, so don't take it too serious, and I won't do the same.
[10] Robert K Foster @ 209.68.64.69 | 14-Aug-02/9:51 AM | Reply
haiku!
[10] Robert K Foster @ 209.68.64.69 | 14-Aug-02/9:52 AM | Reply
haiku!
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