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night owl (5) (Senryu) by elementalidad
family asleep in separate rooms peace at last

Down the ladder: The state of things...

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Arithmetic Mean: 9.0
Weighted score: 5.1897035
Overall Rank: 4746
Posted: September 29, 2008 6:41 AM PDT; Last modified: September 29, 2008 6:41 AM PDT
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Ranger

Comments:
[9] Bethy @ 165.154.46.224 | 29-Sep-08/10:14 AM | Reply
oh the sweet sound of peace... :)
[9] Ranger @ 86.131.54.245 | 6-Oct-08/4:53 PM | Reply
I know more or less nothing about Japanese poetry, but this is a shining example of how good simplicity can be in poetry. Your others try to be a bit too poetic, whereas this makes the reader do all the work without realising it. Top drawer.
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