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Three Worlds (Free verse) by Dovina
Worlds await along the way, attractive to the pen as dots, pulling mind lines, pushing closure, connecting wayward thought. One consists of winners, every weakness strong, joyful shouts from housetops, nothing really wrong. Another world flaunts half as winners— river wearing rocks, weasel doing in the goose, these shoes wear out my socks. One haunts all as losers— sun evaporates the brook, goose-stuffed weasel always dies, the sun itself is cooked. Their gravities will pull you, your pen may visit all, satisfying landscapes, every one a fall.

Down the ladder: Haiku 2004

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Arithmetic Mean: 5.2
Weighted score: 5.0238404
Overall Rank: 7448
Posted: November 11, 2006 1:41 PM PST; Last modified: November 11, 2006 1:41 PM PST
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Comments:
[9] amanda_dcosta @ 61.17.227.34 | 13-Nov-06/6:43 PM | Reply
D... It's surprising how you rhyme your lines. It's so unusual of you.

Apart from that, its sad to see that PR is heart broken.
[8] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 | 14-Nov-06/5:43 AM | Reply
'Weasel doing in the goose'? That's too much Brixton at 3am for me. Either that, or it means something which I dread to imagine. Stanza 4 is really good. I'm surprised that you didn't include the recurring images (river/brook, weasel/goose, sun) in stanza 2 though. Line 9 misses the rhythm - could do with fixing. The rhymes work well though.
[n/a] Dovina @ 204.250.12.246 > Ranger | 14-Nov-06/4:37 PM | Reply
Just trying for a bit of levity in this most serious business. Recurring images - too poetic for left-brained woman I guess.
[3] Stephen Robins @ 213.146.148.199 | 14-Nov-06/9:07 AM | Reply
Christ's chin if that is a portent to the current state of your ewok we are all doomed.
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