poemranker ::parlor games by digipoet

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Free verse № 141959

parlor games

by digipoet

Member since 2006 · Posted 6 Apr 2006 · 1 comment

he throws a dart an ambitious arc has it struck the mark? her gaze asphyxiates "i don't play darts"

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mean 4.00 weighted 4.95 rank 8846 views 154 View voting details →

2 votes so far. Yours would make 3.2 votes so far

1 comment

[8] Ranger 7-Apr-06/12:07 AM Reply
Hmm, failed chat-up line followed up by an icy stare, this is brief and effective. Did you ever read drnick's 'Buried in the Booth'? Pretty much the polar opposite of this.
I'd be tempted to put another line after 'her gaze asphyxiates', probably one to keep the rhyme more solid there. Maybe just 'unfazed', or something like that. Otherwise, very cool.