Windflower

Member since 2005 · Posted 10 Mar 2006 · 3 comments

Can a lilac bloom be like the primrose passion of wholeness lost? Like the salty-sweet electric swell of reckless was? Like our entwinement of new moist suntanned bliss of then? Can it smell even half as sweet as her heavy breath come dawn? Like the young, whispered promise of brand-new forever?

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3 comments

[9] ecargo 10-Mar-06/7:58 PM Reply

"Primrose passion" bugs me, but the rest is pretty good.

[8] Niphredil 11-Mar-06/12:39 PM Reply

I'm afraid my heavy breath come dawn isn't that sweet... that aside, I enjoyed the composition and flow of your poem.

[8] Ranger 11-Mar-06/4:34 PM Reply

I thought this was going to be a collection of haikus when I first saw it. I'd have to agree with ecargo and Niphredil, the rest of it is very pretty. The final stanza in particular brought a smile to my face.