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flickering light (Free verse) by yarlgrenn
Tortoise shells were raining from my forehead today. I almost caught it: nose bleeding, head thrumming. The bedclothes were all twisted up my toes' thick nails were pounding beneath the skin; there was a mess of daisies and lilies and snapdragons. "What?" I said to you. "What!" but there was no reply: Rising, deciding to dance: placing those pink buffalo slippers upon my dainty feet. It was there you made your mistake: underestimating my resolve. "This ring: take-it, take-it. "I beg you: take it "for I wish to blow away in the wind. "My black umbrella catches "and I float away from you forever "among lands of spice and dreams-made-reel."

Up the ladder: My Torcher Chamber
Down the ladder: Oh my gosh what was that?

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 01
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 01
.. 01
.. 12
.. 10
.. 12
.. 02
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 3.7857144
Weighted score: 4.112286
Overall Rank: 13295
Posted: May 10, 2002 1:43 PM PDT; Last modified: May 10, 2002 1:57 PM PDT
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Comments:
[2]... anonymous @ 204.245.176.100 | 16-May-02/10:13 AM | Reply
okay... so you're aiming for the absurd.... but what's beyond that? Absurdity for absurdity's sake...does not a great poem make. You get a 4 for your neon stream of consciousness, just it resembles a trip I went on recently
[9] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 12-Aug-02/5:03 PM | Reply
once again..i must say you have a style edge clean and un-needy..you give before you take, and your timing shows a sensibility that some take years to find let alone understand(i have no timing, still learning) i hear your words in moving pictures they play on the backs of my sleep deprived eye lids as the drive-in theaters of old, you my friend are a relic to be enjoyed with a slow turning of the hand..they will come to read you, cuz you need to be read! i salute you..
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