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the sweet smell of death (Free verse) by pollywolly
the sharp sweet smell chills me to the bone i can feel it watching me peering over me biding its time waiting for the sand to run dry is it cold? i dont feel cold just shivers crawling down my spine like the touch of a hand trickling slowly like the sand its loud! all around me noise so loud fluttering silently pulsating slowly, my heart slowly beating like the sand its dark, blackness glistening flowing robes swirl round me arm raised as scythe passes through the sharp sweet smell i know it now its death come claim me slowly the sand runs dry

Up the ladder: Offering
Down the ladder: A Simple Band of Metal

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Arithmetic Mean: 3.0
Weighted score: 4.905148
Overall Rank: 9770
Posted: January 11, 2006 7:47 AM PST; Last modified: January 11, 2006 7:47 AM PST
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Comments:
[6] daggatolar @ 212.100.65.5 | 11-Jan-06/9:58 AM | Reply
only that it leaves us out, the death that in the end ends us is and comes from inside us
[n/a] amanda_dcosta @ 203.145.159.44 | 29-Jan-06/4:14 AM | Reply
I must say, you are so pessimistic, like you have no hope in life....uck! Forgive me, but somehow, I don't seem to like your taste. You might not see me reviewing much of your poems, though I'd like to see some life in them, so please don't be disappointed.
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