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IN ONE LONG NIGHT (Other) by Prince of Void IN ONE LONG NIGHT
I thought deeply about love
When every second died away
Next Hours and years will be the same
As those seconds have died away
Moments have drifted away
Inside dreams melting away
Nothing'll remain
In this fadeless pain of fate
Up the ladder:
Witch hanging at Dunchurch
Down the ladder:
in love
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 3.25
Posted: December 5, 2005 2:44 PM PST; Last modified: December 5, 2005 2:44 PM PSTWeighted score: 4.7913947 Overall Rank: 11254 Comments:
[5]
wilco @ 24.92.74.122
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7-Dec-05/8:37 PM
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Reply
This is probably the most poetic thing you've written. Change the nothing'll to nothing will and rework the last line. Also the 4th line could use a little tweak.
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