poemranker ::The Comedy of Mighty Rockmage: Combatting Old Age. by Don-Quixote

DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

Free verse № 126236

The Comedy of Mighty Rockmage: Combatting Old Age.

by Don-Quixote

Member since 2003 · Posted 4 Jun 2005 · Edited 7 Jun 2005 · 16 comments

Be queerly, be dumb, but scratch not thy thumb 'pon the grind wheel of rockmage! Earth be his stage, opinion the hallmark of his rage. Woe to this crumbling onion! Woe to he that grinds and leaves not but dust! All he speaks is truth, and yearns for things just!-- yet in blind abandon he does lie, taking pains to appear humble! Made of stone is this mage, die he shall with shallow rumble! Woe to this illusionist, this envious fraud of a mage! Pity he who can not bend, fearful his statue might dissolve if he leans twixt his legs 'n takes a whiff at the shit dribbling out of his own queer bristled 'n soiled ass!

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mean 5.25 weighted 5.03 rank 7340 views 260 View voting details →

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16 comments

[n/a] Don-Quixote 4-Jun-05/10:03 AM Reply
Now please bless this Gauntlet with a kiss, Rockmage? Mayhaps thou knowest custom only in ranker tongue?

Lemme translate then, ole chap...

Stamp this graffito with a zero, you old fart, and alas I shall receive the prize which is rightfully mine. Hurry along now, I wish not to rouse thy bowels too slowly!
[n/a] Dental Panic › Don-Quixote 4-Jun-05/4:05 PM Reply
What's your problem? This is the third one I've read about the man, who is, like he said himself, simply expressing his opinion. Is it so easy to tempt the chumps into the frenzy? Make a fuzz, cause a buzz.
[n/a] Don-Quixote › Dental Panic 6-Jun-05/1:50 AM Reply
He also zero bombed two of my five profiles in retaliation for this piece. He's also done this before, voted for himself, repeatedly, among other things. And yes, it is easy, and for me, extremely amusing.

His methodes are petty. I could give him a minute amount of respect if he had the wit and ability to make a parody of a poem I wrote in reaction, or simply a piece belittling me. But instead, he apparently is only skilled enough to click his over-fingered mouse. His index finger has most definitely developed a thick callus, his mind though remains puddy soft.

Speaking of causing a buzz, dope gives me a better high. This is like... premature ejaculation during masturbation-- amusing but ultimately disappointing. ;]
[1] deleted user 4-Jun-05/4:11 PM Reply
Children's comedyhour?
[n/a] Don-Quixote › deleted user 6-Jun-05/1:29 AM Reply
Something like that, yes. ;]
[10] ALChemy 4-Jun-05/5:42 PM Reply
Hypocrite.
[n/a] Don-Quixote › ALChemy 6-Jun-05/1:35 AM Reply
You have to admit though, mines funnier. And about being a hypocrite? I'm guilty. Cept I never zero bombed anyones entire profile, and never voted for myself, never. That said, I still retain that small amount of dignity, and honor a few principles.

Everything else is game, and this dance gets bloody baby. >EG<
[10] zodiac 6-Jun-05/6:05 AM Reply
Except for "pretends only he be humble", which is incomprehensible, the best oldey talk you've ever written.
[n/a] SupremeDreamer › zodiac 7-Jun-05/2:40 PM Reply
Then I shall replace that bit with "taking pains to appear humble!" and claim the apex of oldey speech as me wicked trophy!!
[10] zodiac › SupremeDreamer 8-Jun-05/9:53 PM Reply
Unfortunately, every other time you've tried to talk oldey lately you've come off like a garbage disposal trying to gargle Coriolanus.
[n/a] Don-Quixote › zodiac 27-Nov-06/10:02 AM Reply
Don't trample my dreams ;(
[1] deleted user 6-Jun-05/5:33 PM Reply
I find this uninteresting. You should put more thought into it.
[10] ALChemy 7-Jun-05/3:44 PM Reply
You'd think you would have vented all your hostility in your poetry but your cup overflows don't it.
This guy must be the thorn in your side. Here's a band-aid -10-
[n/a] SupremeDreamer › ALChemy 7-Jun-05/3:51 PM Reply
My repost was simply done in order to fix the single flaw in my use of old speak that zodiac pointed out. Hostility has nothing to do with it, my lil slothful Miggletoe.
[10] ALChemy › SupremeDreamer 8-Jun-05/6:47 AM Reply
Assuming this is D_Q. I was actually talking about all the ranting in your comment and reply boxes. Which by the way I found very entertaining. "My lil slothful Miggletoe?" made me laugh my ass off.
[10] zodiac 8-Jun-05/10:16 PM Reply
Horus8, on rockmage:
"What you did was give nentwined, shushin, intransit, richa, abcedarian, and shanon8764565, triple sets of tens on all of their poems to cover your ass, so no one would mind when you gave me 900 zeros."
15-Nov-03

-=Dark_Angel=-,P.I.:
"rockmage awarded this poeme 9. The average score awarded by rockmage is 9.51. Therefore rockmage has deemed this poeme to be below average."
27-Jan-04

zodiac:
"penguin received on his last post the lowest score I've ever seen rockmage give - a 5."
27-Jan-04

Horus:
"So let me get this straight you give people you like tens whether you've read the material or not, and people you don't like zeros using the same method? And we wonder what went wrong with democracy? lol."
15-Nov-03

Fraser Allonby:
"I think it's silly to have more than one username. By the way, I notice that rockmage has many additional usernames: newagepoet2000, fatmansinging, sixtoedwonder, flouredweevle, assisenormus, masticatedmess, andyourhorsetoo, wahwahwahwha, gourdgrabber, sickerofdogs, foothangingoutofass, smarmyfaurt, lackoforiginality, Isureamstupid, and bulgingbuttocks."
4-Feb-04

rockmage:
"Tis true. From my zero war with horus8."
4-Feb-04

The surprising thing about all of this isn't that it's all been done before, nor even that someone could think most of our poems deserve zeros. It's that rockmage still seems to be under the illusion that he's objective and literary.