Help | About | Suggestions | Alms | Chat [0] | Users [0] | Log In | Join
 Search:
Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments   

Actor (Free verse) by horus8
There was a time when I did not think, but open the mouth and move words, and then there is now. There was a place carved out of hillside Where children played with wooden swords And summer was heaven. And somewhere between Rolf and Hamlet I eyeball Richard the III, thinking... 'Fuck, a beard and a bow'? Right now, I read great and stupid books Vaguely noting the comparison As my eyes duly sweep smoggy mountains There was a story I recall About a man on a deserted island, but then, just like that Came Friday, so he did it again, and again hitting his mark Like God-smack. I have a dream My face is mutilated I've become Tom Cruise, but taller. I think 'fuck, I was hoping for a thin Val Kilmer and maybe a golden globe' I wake up on mushrooms in Malibu Mumbling about god and math, and women find me attractive Because I'll put up with anything, but getting in my light (Or stepping on my lines).

Up the ladder: forgetful dyke
Down the ladder: this bitter heart

You must be logged in to leave comments. Vote:

Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 10
.. 20
.. 40
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 20

Arithmetic Mean: 6.7
Weighted score: 5.85
Overall Rank: 1581
Posted: May 3, 2005 2:29 PM PDT; Last modified: May 4, 2005 12:22 AM PDT
View voting details
Comments:
[8] jessicazee @ 152.163.100.135 | 3-May-05/2:29 PM | Reply
Kill the 1st stanza (unfortunate words considering the theme) but your story which follows needs not such a intangible introduction.
P.S. I've had 2 Tom Cruise dreams in the last year and does he realize his celebrity has encroached on Everyman's sleep space? weird!
[9] Ranger @ 131.251.0.55 | 3-May-05/2:29 PM | Reply
creative, I like the initial loose rhyme. 'I was hoping for a thin Val Kilmer'...certainly sir. 9
[8] INTRANSIT @ 204.110.228.254 | 3-May-05/2:29 PM | Reply
Sorry we couldn't meet fer a minute while I was out there. Bidness is bidness, right?
[8] fevriere @ 62.254.128.7 | 3-May-05/2:29 PM | Reply
I didn't like the final stanza. But I DID like the first few.
[7] Alizarin_Crimson @ 24.250.22.18 | 3-May-05/2:29 PM | Reply
By the end, I feel as though we've lost the original point. what is "fuck, a beard and a bow?" Is that the voice of the child, realizing the difficulty of pulling that off? And the story about the man...I guess I din't read that book...
[0] Edna Sweetlove @ 81.178.237.73 | 23-May-06/4:01 PM | Reply
More horsedung.
295 view(s)




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001