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The Mighty Brahmaputra (Free verse) by Bhaskaryya
Flickering upon it, the sun’s hued rays. The mighty Brahmaputra, with its golden glaze, Haunting all with its spectral blaze, Flowed solely for weary minds to amaze. Hackneyed with drudgery for days, Still looking to swallow those words of faze, I struggle to break free from this cerebral cage Looking for a destination through the uncertain haze Seeking escape from this taunting phase, And once and for all, all memories erase, I walk down the alien street and with sunken eyes gaze At those blue waters, meandering with laze. Watching it take its course with nothing to forage, For a moment, I drift to my childhood days Oh, such carefree were those youthful ways, A hand to support, when your feet rummage. But the winds must sway and so it sways, Taking away forever, that once a blithe stage Drifting away to the perplexing maze, To write your name either on the blue or red page. It was late, fading were those sun’s rays, Yet, my eyes desired to linger and graze At that ever so enchanting image, But I had to move along my ways… And it was after many a passing days, My mind was taken by utter daze, When I read about that river’s craze And the city that its violent gushes did erase. But the winds must sway, and so it sways Forcing the mighty river to alter its ways, Drifting away to the perplexing maze, To write it’s name either on the blue or red page. Then in my mind, this thought did braise, The river and we humans sometime encounter the same maze But with its colossal might, the river chose to raze And wrote its name forever on the red page.

Up the ladder: Elusive Dream
Down the ladder: puff

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Arithmetic Mean: 5.8
Weighted score: 5.095362
Overall Rank: 6125
Posted: January 7, 2005 8:28 PM PST; Last modified: January 7, 2005 8:28 PM PST
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Comments:
[6] Dovina @ 69.175.6.101 | 8-Jan-05/9:08 AM | Reply
I think you sacrifice too much for the rhymes - grammar, clarity, even interest.
[n/a] Bhaskaryya @ 61.0.144.56 > Dovina | 8-Jan-05/9:11 AM | Reply
Yes, i indeed have sacrificed.....But it's just a format I wanted to try...I'm still in my experimenting age!!
[n/a] horus8 @ 24.130.62.63 | 8-Jan-05/12:33 PM | Reply
An ass-sandwich, holding the pickle.
[n/a] Bhaskaryya @ 61.0.144.104 > horus8 | 9-Jan-05/2:02 AM | Reply
What does that mean in context to the poem??
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