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Thereâs A Voice Deep Inside My Head

Member since 2004 · Posted 10 Nov 2004 · 6 comments

Deep, deep within my head, Is a voice chatting to me while Iâm in bed. Iâm listening to the voice The tiny voice inside my head Telling me it is full of dread. The dread inside my head. Itâs all a mistake To listen to that voice But I guess I donât have a choice But deep beneath my skin The voice whispering again To show me what to do, To start fresh, to start anew. To start a new life with a new hope With new people to interlope My head is spinning fast I hope the voice will last Deep, deep within my head.

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7 votes so far. Yours would make 8.7 votes so far

6 comments

[6] sliver 10-Nov-04/11:43 PM Reply

If this is what you want do say, that's o.k, But re-write, again and again. Where to begin? In the first stanza, using dread, and then beating it 'till it's dead, No. Buy a Thesourus, find a chorus, and next time... try not to bore us. But KEEP WRITING.

[6] Dovina 11-Nov-04/12:19 PM Reply

Little said for so many words.

[n/a] celticskatermatt1 12-Nov-04/11:49 AM Reply

thanks for the advice

[n/a] horus8 12-Nov-04/4:38 PM Reply

See, this is a perfect example of why you should be paying attention to that giant black cock up your ass instead.

[n/a] Plaidypus 17-May-05/6:44 PM Reply

All the lions are clawing at your guts right now, because they can't stand the fact that your work is more sincere than theirs. Thanks for remaining Un-pretentious. Hopefully they will start to pay more attention to the cocks up THEIR asses!!!

[9] cabot 13-Oct-05/4:36 PM Reply

awsome poem dude. you rock, see you in marine science