poemranker ::Screws by helenwales

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Other № 112926

Screws

by helenwales

Member since 2004 · Posted 21 Sep 2004 · 7 comments

Dark and unending, Pressing into me your ice cold, Deeper than my own want, Deeper than logic, Opened now the skies above me dance and shiver, Lath and plaster against the tide.

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mean 6.71 weighted 5.46 rank 2885 views 173 View voting details →

7 votes so far. Yours would make 8.7 votes so far

7 comments

[8] Sasha 22-Sep-04/3:34 PM Reply
Helo, here's another welsh poet!

Helo, dyma bardd arall cymreig!
[8] horus8 22-Sep-04/4:52 PM Reply
Another swell read.
[8] deleted user 23-Sep-04/5:35 AM Reply
Being preceded by lines all ending in commas the line break 'the skies above/ me dance' gives me a headache.

The poem has nice sounds. Not sure what 'pressing into me your ice cold' is all about. Perhaps something to do with the morrissey song 'Phallus in a freezer'.
[n/a] helenwales › deleted user 23-Sep-04/3:43 PM Reply
Grammer has never been my strongest point - even though I'm an editor by trade! Interesting point about the Morrissey song. I am a fan but not about that one.
[8] wFraser Allonby Q.C.w 24-Sep-04/2:31 AM Reply
Absholutely shplendid. But who is pressing their ice-cold what into your what?

[n/a] daggatolar 24-Sep-04/5:24 AM Reply
if nuts gets opened, the screw-driving is well done.
only that, after the "dance" .... whose's flesh wears the "plasters" and who pays the bill for the pains.
[9] nypoet22 11-Oct-06/4:25 AM Reply
one of these years i'll visit my cousins in wales. good stuff.