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Screws (Other) by helenwales Dark and unending,
Pressing into me your ice cold,
Deeper than my own want,
Deeper than logic,
Opened now the skies above
me dance and shiver,
Lath and plaster against the tide.
Up the ladder:
Achilles, Mothers, and the Gods of war
Down the ladder:
Heavenly HOst!
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.714286
Posted: September 21, 2004 4:25 PM PDT; Last modified: September 21, 2004 4:25 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.4610424 Overall Rank: 2895 Comments:
Another swell read.
Being preceded by lines all ending in commas the line break 'the skies above/ me dance' gives me a headache.
The poem has nice sounds. Not sure what 'pressing into me your ice cold' is all about. Perhaps something to do with the morrissey song 'Phallus in a freezer'.
Grammer has never been my strongest point - even though I'm an editor by trade! Interesting point about the Morrissey song. I am a fan but not about that one.
Absholutely shplendid. But who is pressing their ice-cold what into your what?
if nuts gets opened, the screw-driving is well done.
only that, after the "dance" .... whose's flesh wears the "plasters" and who pays the bill for the pains.
one of these years i'll visit my cousins in wales. good stuff.
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Helo, dyma bardd arall cymreig!