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FALLING ASLEEP (Free verse) by AM I EVIL? its late at night so now you sleep
lay your head down to count those sheep
close your eyes just drift away
get well rested for the next day
thoughts in mind coming and going
late dreams just start flowing
now its early morning almost dawn
but that dont matter cuz your still gone
Up the ladder:
You Fell Asleep First
Down the ladder:
My back (An explanation)
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.2
Posted: September 2, 2004 9:32 PM PDT; Last modified: September 2, 2004 9:32 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.2622466 Overall Rank: 3988 Comments:
[7]
sliver @ 63.190.73.230
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3-Sep-04/10:16 AM
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Reply
oooh k, kinda common, try to spice it up.
This is a good poem, I really did like it it's a sad poem...because the last line tells us that the person is gone....a lot more could be added to the poem emotionally if you worked on this one....but it is still very good....( I hope you didn' t mind me giving advise, not the best at it...)
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