|
|
Gap-Fold vs. Sour Milk (Free verse) by Venus
Onceâ¦
Freshly laundered attire
Downy-fresh and Gap-folded
tucked away in the correct Oak drawer
Now
Tank tops and yoga pants
strewn about and half-dirty
lingerie languishing away in Corona boxes
There were meals with more than one course
healthy after-school snacks and strawberry smoothies
and a proudly bursting dishwasher everyday
Now
Styrofoam and cardboard
guarding open space in the fridge
arguing with a sour quart of milk
There were the farm duties of family
the grocery store and the spelling tests
summer camp and vacations to be planned
Now
Buy more TP, attend a Sedaris reading
party upstairs and swallow margs across the street
politics du âjour and a new piece to write
Basket of fresh towels
in the bathroom serves few
Nudes on the walls just clash
with putty-colored paint
sloppily applied by a former ghost
of this box I now call âhomeâ
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
| Graph | Votes |
10 |
|
2 | 0 |
9 |
|
1 | 0 |
8 |
|
0 | 1 |
7 |
|
0 | 0 |
6 |
|
0 | 0 |
5 |
|
0 | 0 |
4 |
|
0 | 0 |
3 |
|
0 | 0 |
2 |
|
0 | 0 |
1 |
|
0 | 0 |
0 |
|
1 | 0 |
|
Arithmetic Mean: 7.4
Weighted score: 5.286087
Overall Rank: 3753
Posted: July 25, 2004 8:29 PM PDT; Last modified: July 28, 2004 7:48 AM PDT
View voting details
Comments:
250 view(s)
|
you might also set it up like a lyric, using that set (plus a bit more) as a chorus then a bridge to set up the last bit.
That could work too, I think.