poemranker ::Paradelle of Progress by Dovina

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Other № 107380

Paradelle of Progress

by Dovina

Member since 2004 · Posted 5 Jul 2004 · Edited 5 Jul 2004 · 16 comments

I remember the thin form of nervous strain I remember the thin form of nervous strain And emotional deposit on blank page And emotional deposit on blank page I deposit and remember the form of thin strain Emotional blank on nervous page

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mean 8.00 weighted 6.50 rank 696 views 391 View voting details →

10 votes so far. Yours would make 11.10 votes so far

16 comments

[n/a] Dovina 5-Jul-04/9:14 AM Reply
Note: The paradelle is one of the more demanding French fixed forms, first appearing in love poetry of the eleventh century. It’s a poem of four six-line stanzas in which the first and second lines, and the third and fourth lines, of the first three stanzas, must be identical. The fifth and sixth lines, which traditionally resolve these stanzas, must use all the words from the preceding lines and only those words. The final stanza must use every word from all the preceding stanzas and only those words.
Here I have presented only the first stanza, hoping to perfect all six stanzas into a monumental epitaph. I can then die having accomplished a worthy life’s mission.
[n/a] zodiac › Dovina 5-Jul-04/10:14 AM Reply
After reading this explanation on comments-recent, I expected this poem to be a lot more impressive than it actually is.
[n/a] Dovina › zodiac 5-Jul-04/10:17 AM Reply
What may I do to impress you?
[9] Dan garcia-Black › Dovina 6-Jul-04/10:53 AM Reply
When last I fought the sixest paradelle, the referee admonished me about using "only those words" by instructing me that I could use other forms of "only those words." This allows "thinning forms" or "emotionally blank" "and other aberrations. Perhaps, my English prof was an aberration. Still, a -10- for 1/6th of a complete poem... Are you going for a combined score of 60 for whole poem? I'm drawing a nervous, emotional blank on the proper score.
[n/a] Dovina › Dan garcia-Black 6-Jul-04/11:00 AM Reply
A 10 is quite acceptable, considering that I did not yield to the temptation of breaking out, even in the slightest, from the constraint of paradelle, and have at least attempted to provide your burning ears with the utmost in poetic accomplishment.
[n/a] deleted user 5-Jul-04/11:45 AM Reply
I also remember my latest deposit.
[n/a] Dovina › deleted user 5-Jul-04/4:59 PM Reply
Thanks for illuminating darkness on a thing I thought single-minded, if not classy. Naive me.
[n/a] wilco 5-Jul-04/12:28 PM Reply
I'm not sure about the form. I'll have to learn about it and will hold my vote until I do so.
[n/a] Dovina › wilco 5-Jul-04/2:13 PM Reply
It may not be worth the trouble.
[n/a] wilco › Dovina 18-Jul-04/7:52 PM Reply
After some (although most certainly not extensive) research, I have decided that it is not.
[7] titan69 5-Jul-04/2:14 PM Reply
It stinks
it stinks
stink it
stink it
it does??
it does stink
[n/a] Dovina › titan69 5-Jul-04/2:27 PM Reply
Very cute, but you're not following the paradelle form.
[9] Dan garcia-Black 6-Jul-04/10:57 AM Reply
When not sure if a -10- is too much, be a coward and give a 9+.
[9] Quarton 6-Jul-04/2:20 PM Reply
congrats on trying something new and different. I
enjoyed and give it a nine. Only 5 more to go?
[8] Shuushin 6-Jul-04/7:18 PM Reply
Difficult form; I've got a crown I've been working on for about 2 years.

Keep at it.
[7] Prince of Void 13-Jul-04/2:02 PM Reply
I like it that was good