My Pain 2004

Member since 2004 · Posted 9 Apr 2004 · 3 comments

My Pain 2004 I do not know why i cannot deal with this pain I do not know what its trying to gain Is it trying to drive me insane? Or maybe elevate me to another plane No matter how hard I try sometimes i feel like i need to die To escape this long nasty sword through my heart Pretty soon it will rip me apart After all is said and done I will not have it in me to have any fun So before i get down and keep taking this Licken I feel like giving pain one last ass kickin

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mean 2.43 weighted 4.31 rank 13110 views 231 View voting details →

7 votes so far. Yours would make 8.7 votes so far

3 comments

[0] thepinkbunnyofdoom 10-Apr-04/2:02 AM Reply

Who Do You Think Your Kidding? You Call This A Free Verse? Pimple, Its Called A Pimple, And ITS TERRIBLE! There is no depth, nothing more than whining, and trying to rhyme. Learn about the art, before you stumble thru another rhyme session with boo-woo your host Bandaid Butter Fingers! -0-

[7] deleted user 10-Apr-04/10:00 AM Reply

The last line is good. The rest is a play on rhymes, too many words for what it says.

[0] cheese.doodles 26-Apr-07/4:23 PM Reply

cliched rhymes and uncapitalized i's make this seem puerile and just... bad.