Causation

Member since 2004 · Posted 10 Mar 2004 · 2 comments

Looking out of the window, I am free The blank sky is everything to me and nothing. No thing can keep me this way. So far I've survived every day Every day with you in it Every day without you. Scrawling an essay fast, I am me The blank page needs these chains to be free. These things can keep me alive until That arrives. I survive Every day with you in it. Every day without you.

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mean 4.67 weighted 4.96 rank 8610 views 158 View voting details →

3 votes so far. Yours would make 4.3 votes so far

2 comments

[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 10-Mar-04/6:25 AM Reply

I'm miles from home, I'm hurting, I'm in a cafe, and I write. I write.

[7] Shuushin 10-Mar-04/7:35 AM Reply

Is not too bad, really.

I hesitate slightly at some of the rhymes (arrive and alive) in particular and a couple grammar issues (...essay fast - fast wants to be an adverb and is not) - and I'm usually pretty easy going with that kind of thing in poetry.

It does a nice job at conveying the loss