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After The Years Howl By (Free verse) by Lenore
Here in this winter with snow too deep, Intolerably cold in its blanket of white; The ice is forming, as day withdraws for night I think of you and sage with lemon tea, Rolling fields of our New England; and the sea Where we harbored secrets in bright foam, Facing wind, the sunset turned for home Our youth flawless, sweet and free. I remember the high moon blue-white, shining on the drumming shore; showered in arrows of light, our shadows danced in their luminous flight together fused in flesh still ripe. Now here tracing your name in crystal upon my frosted pain, weeping tears the length of rivers in tribute to the same. I’ll leave these hopes unspoken and cast this dream away, no more to pine in sorrow or long for ancient days.

Up the ladder: Idle Time
Down the ladder: only you

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Arithmetic Mean: 5.6666665
Weighted score: 5.0794687
Overall Rank: 6473
Posted: January 28, 2004 12:07 PM PST; Last modified: January 28, 2004 12:07 PM PST
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Comments:
[9] zodiac @ 152.30.44.144 | 28-Jan-04/2:39 PM | Reply
The main problem is the title. Good Ode-y meter and part-rhyme.
[n/a] Lenore @ 64.252.107.161 > zodiac | 28-Jan-04/4:03 PM | Reply
I tend to struggle with titles. But then again, It's hard when you're a dork. Any suggestions?
[8] Joshua_Tree @ 68.230.105.101 | 19-Jun-05/12:20 PM | Reply
Could be tighter with more active voice, but bitter-sweet with good foreshadowing. Nice.
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