| Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments |
|
Just Passing Through (Free verse) by southernboy71 Just passing through and thought I may never pass this way again.
My life is an open road, Never knowing where I may go.
I like to think that the nicer the people I get to meet, The better a
person I become.
Just passing through and though I may never pass this way again, And I
hope to have made a friend.
Up the ladder:
a fat man on the dock
Down the ladder:
My reflection
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.0
Posted: January 26, 2004 8:57 AM PST; Last modified: January 26, 2004 10:41 AM PSTWeighted score: 5.0 Overall Rank: 7565 Comments:
[n/a]
deleted user @ 24.222.81.233
|
26-Jan-04/10:35 AM
|
Reply
Thruogh is spelled Throooooo.
Ok...Thanks for bringing that to my attention...Guess my fingers got moveing to fast LOL..
lines three and four are quite good, has a nice laidback feel
No.... I wrote this about 20 years ago. I was at the top of Mt. Eagle in Tenn at the( Top of the Rock ) truck stop. Was on a trip fromm GA.To Indiana.
This is kind of my outlook on life...It is applied to every journy my life takes me through.
"I like to think that the nicer the people I get to meet, The better a person I become." This line needs to be reworded.
i read in your comments that this was written when you were "at the top of Mt. Eagle in Tenn." at a truck stop
throw in some specifics about that place to make this more interesting right now it reads more like monologue than poetry
Ok. I understand what you are saying but what I wrote had nothing to do about the truck stop or where I was at in general.It was the thoughts of a 12 year old boy on the outlook of life and how to make moveing and leaving the things you have grown to know behind...
ok, fine
i didn't get any of that information from this poem though i'm just saying you would do well to sprinkle in some concrete imagery
And I would have to agree. I have never changed this poem as it is to me a constant reminder to myself of the 12 year old that wrote it that still resides within me.
123 view(s)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
