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i'm falling for u damnit!

Member since 2004 · Posted 25 Jan 2004 · 8 comments

point your lashes down, picture my face out of frown, like a princess with a crown, i'm smiling.. part your lips with a smile, say that you'll stay for a lasting while, break my ego you know it's fragile, i'm floating.. place your arms around my waist, wrap me up and leave me with no choice, embrace my uncertainty in moist, i'm waiting.. rest your lips against mine, let the bees buzzing in line, let the birds sing merrily up at the pine, you know i'm not doing fine, i'm falling.. i'm falling for u goddamnit!dun tell me it's only a game..

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mean 5.00 weighted 5.00 rank 7675 views 231 View voting details →

5 votes so far. Yours would make 6.5 votes so far

8 comments

[n/a] deleted user 26-Jan-04/10:39 AM Reply

Is it gravy in the third part?

[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 26-Jan-04/5:31 PM Reply

bum

[n/a] clumseYdaiseY › -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 27-Jan-04/1:14 AM Reply

bum?

[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. › clumseYdaiseY 27-Jan-04/3:11 AM Reply

yes

[n/a] clumseYdaiseY › -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 29-Jan-04/8:34 PM Reply

what's yer problem?may i guess?

[7] Freethinker1602 26-Jan-04/8:35 PM Reply

good job. I can empathize.

[n/a] clumseYdaiseY › Freethinker1602 27-Jan-04/1:13 AM Reply

Thank you.It took me a pail of sweat to hef the guts.A big appreciation! :)

[3] Joshua_Tree 18-Jun-05/8:58 PM Reply

Most of the rhymes are forced and there are a few grammar issues. Elimate the metaphors that don't work and you might yet become an e e cummings.