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I hope it hurts (Free verse) by pretty_poet_21
I hope he knows how much I like him, how bad he hurt me. I hope that every day something reminds him of me, and that every day it eats away at him. I hope that it hurts. I hope that his friends ask about me, so that I never get far from his thoughts. I hope that when he lies down to sleep at night, he misses my presence, and wonders where I am and what I'm doing. And I hope it hurts. I hope that he rememebers all the great times, and regrets that they are through. I hope when he's alone, he recalls the bitter tears that streaked my face, and fell heavily upon his pillow. I hope he adds to them, and I hope it hurts. I hope that every time I'm around, he sees the pain that I can't hide. I hope he knows how desperately I want to hate him. I hope he knows I can't. And I hope it hurts. But mostly, I hope he'll change his mind, and want me once again.

Up the ladder: Waiting On A Friend

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.5
Weighted score: 5.4034123
Overall Rank: 3164
Posted: January 24, 2004 11:55 AM PST; Last modified: January 24, 2004 11:55 AM PST
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Comments:
[n/a] deleted user @ 24.222.81.233 | 24-Jan-04/1:01 PM | Reply
My bum hurts.
[n/a] pretty_poet_21 @ 198.111.220.6 > deleted user | 24-Jan-04/1:12 PM | Reply
I did not delete your last comment intentionally. Not that it's an exuse, but I've never been to this site before, and I hit the wrong button. Please bestow your forgiving grace upon me (and yes...that was sarcastic).
[n/a] deleted user @ 24.222.81.233 | 24-Jan-04/1:22 PM | Reply
Please refract my latest comments.
[n/a] deleted user @ 24.222.81.233 > deleted user | 24-Jan-04/1:23 PM | Reply
I have changed my mind. It steadies the bowels.
[2] andrewjthomas @ 66.93.78.35 | 26-Jan-04/8:04 PM | Reply
i tried to leave a comment before but it gave me an error
basically, i think you are telling way too much
you need to show us more
give an incident before and after the breakup to illustrate your pain
hint at your want for him to hurt as much as you do
let the reader infer that even though you hurt so much
you secretly want him to come back to you
144 view(s)




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