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iron coil (Free verse) by Shit-Crumpets
now dead, or so you said, its ok my nemesis. choked me silly -the sound of gasps made you smile. Iron coil burn and boil put me under the soil and suck off the last drop of oil You will celebrate this day its tradition, and another way to gloat. make a profit, a liar with a dental plan and blank fingerprints tell the grandkiddies all about sucking me dry, and taking them to college after repeating my last words Iron coil burn and boil put me under the soil and suck off the last drop of oil what a shitty bedtime story give them nightmares ole buddy.

Up the ladder: Exquisite butterflies

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.5
Weighted score: 5.1788044
Overall Rank: 4933
Posted: November 18, 2003 5:44 PM PST; Last modified: November 18, 2003 5:44 PM PST
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Comments:
[10] Shuushin @ 207.5.211.177 | 18-Nov-03/7:02 PM | Reply
A supreme effort.

Very much liked.

;O]

-10-
[n/a] Shit-Crumpets @ 204.31.175.116 > Shuushin | 18-Nov-03/7:06 PM | Reply
no, i didnt try at all.
just needed to post something.
[9] horus8 @ 24.126.116.54 | 18-Nov-03/7:24 PM | Reply
I liked it.
[7] little_big_nose @ 163.153.198.103 | 3-Feb-05/5:57 AM | Reply
I don't think you meant for this to be a great poem, but I'm under the impression it means something speical to you
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