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Shoe Hole (Free verse) by Bobjim
Look at the God-damn shoe hole. Curse the Phillips stick-sole. Only out for a short stroll, When the bloody thing wore through. Look at the state of the uppers, Ain't no high-steppin' strutters, Rather be home behind shutters, Than walking these gardens of Kew. Look at the knotted laces. Certain they've seen a few places. A proper pair of disgraces. I just don't know what to do. Wish I'd settled for cloggies. They don't get bitten by doggies And they stop you sinking in boggies But cost a penny or two. Sod it I think I'll go barefoot (As long as I don't step in bear poop). Suppose that I'd just better bear up And stop all this hullabaloo. Thank you.

Down the ladder: Let Go

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 10
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.. 20
.. 01
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Arithmetic Mean: 5.25
Weighted score: 5.0672355
Overall Rank: 6649
Posted: October 7, 2003 12:46 PM PDT; Last modified: October 7, 2003 12:46 PM PDT
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Comments:
[n/a] <~> @ 167.206.181.179 | 7-Oct-03/12:54 PM | Reply
1-4 rock. 5 sucks. that is all.
[7] Shuushin @ 147.154.235.53 | 7-Oct-03/1:27 PM | Reply
Kew Gardens, New York?

I'm stuck by "Phillips stick-sole" - is that a type of rubber sole, like Vibram? As an aside, I was watching "Enterprise", and as the aliens climbed the ladder I could see the bottoms of their boots and that orange oval "Vibrams"; oops.

Only a couple of the rhymes seemed forced (first felt it with "shutters", "boggies" a bit too). I bet you could firm up the last quatrain.

At any rate, it is a very fun one. How on earth did you come up with it? I mean, "shoe hole" isn't exactly a common idea.
[8] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 7-Oct-03/4:44 PM | Reply
hulahoop would've worked better.
[7] SupremeDreamer @ 204.31.175.60 | 8-Oct-03/12:20 AM | Reply
want me to donate some sandals?

blessed with 7
[n/a] deleted user @ 81.149.77.93 | 20-Mar-08/4:03 AM | Reply
This poem was written by Robert Rankin. You've just copied it you fraud
[0] deleted user @ 192.229.17.103 | 20-Mar-08/5:45 AM | Reply
You have stolen this poem from Robert Rankin and attempted to pass it off as your own work.

YOU ARE A FRAUD, A PLAGIARIST, AND A THIEF!
[0] deleted user @ 192.229.17.103 | 20-Mar-08/5:45 AM | Reply
You have stolen this poem from Robert Rankin and attempted to pass it off as your own work.

YOU ARE A FRAUD, A PLAGIARIST, AND A THIEF!
[n/a] deleted user @ 90.210.194.144 > deleted user | 24-Mar-08/8:56 AM | Reply
I think this poem is excellent.

Long live Rankin.

If anyone out there would like to see more of Roberts work (the real author of this poem and others that bobjim has stolen)then please look him up. You can probably already see he has a large and devoted fanbase. He would appeal to anyone found of Jasper Fforde or Terry Pratchett (although he wouldn't thank me for saying that!)and is a very compelling author of far fetched fiction; his body of work is prolific and he usually has a large amount of shelf space in all major bookshops.
[n/a] deleted user @ 212.240.88.197 | 25-Mar-08/8:06 PM | Reply
I'm getting bored now, I hope you are too Bobjim. :D
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