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1967 Ford Carmine Jalopy (Free verse) by SupremeDreamer Emerald eyes gaze over dented metal
painted a faded ruby red;
the shell that coats
my broken down 1967 Ford.
The pathetic sight of this
deformed vehicle invokes
the frustrated sighs
of self pity.
Jean-clad ass cheeks slide
into an off-white leather seat.
My inner universe descends
into a twilight trance.
Frayed tires roam intumescing
ferroconcrete, unfolded infinitely
along the gangdoms of Los Angeles.
My tongue besmeared scorched,
vodka flavored lips,
while uttering vulgar complaints
in a spout of california road rage.
Thoughts effuse in a super-sonic flux,
focused on how I'm gonna pay back
my Korean peddler for all those
opiate influenced nights
that were mulcted onto my tab.
Inflamed eyeballs glare through
my begrimed windshield to discover
scores of abandoned hondas, wagons,
and S.U.V's.
Damned yuppies appreciate nothing.
Their compact, jap-made tin cans
are conveniently designed
to fit in the sardine slots
of sun-baked parking lots.
Rarely do I ever find a goddamn
polished, achromatic double bed
for my over the hill pollution machine.
Up the ladder:
sharkmouth
Down the ladder:
Gaolbreak: Jade Marlboro
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.8333335
Posted: August 9, 2003 7:10 PM PDT; Last modified: August 9, 2003 7:10 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.7620006 Overall Rank: 1785 Comments:
Oh, but could've done w/out the "emerald eyes" (been there).
been there? my lil fairy, i HAVE those green eyes... ;/
Right, I got that, but isn't there something you could call them besides "emerald"? It's too Disney for my taste.
eh, sure, but i consider my eyes to be emerald ;P
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"Frayed tires roam intumescing
ferroconcrete, unfolded infinitely
along the gangdoms of Los Angeles."- good vocabulary words!
Im quite proud of my gradual but sure mastering of the dictionary.
of course I can , because as I've said... I'm drunk
Horus said something to me recently .. um er.. to Retaliate recently that his Mentor (the capital was conspicuos) apparently told him:
(and this has caused me to think about the subject dammit)
"You've strung together some nice words" was the phrase.
Is it possible that increasing one's vocabulary actually decreases one's effectiveness as a poet?
Or maybe that's just the homebrew speakin'
(As a fellow LA dweller I appreciate the humour, but I'm going to find you and burn your car to a briquette so that you can claim insurance and the environment can sleep better)
horus once called me supremely head in the clouds once that i recall.. heh.. course, my actual name is Lee. ;)
My funny friend, i dont string shit together unless its going to make some amount of sense.. take out a dictionary and tell me what phrases i made that didnt make a damn wittle of sense oki?
Dont worry about me needing to do this, I DID do just that before picking the words. And even before playing with the wordy cafe universe, i did two drafts and worked the damned thing out.
course, im human, so take a crack at it and lets see if i did the dictionary magic correctly.
also, i dont actually live in LA.. im in san jose, this is an almost pure creation of me imagination space adventure...
i drive a nice pair of muscled legs and rough soled feet.. heh.
And, yeah it can decrease ones effectiveness, but it all depends on HOW you do it..
and dude, talkin about comin around to burn my nonexistent car is a bit scary.. i mean, i am called "supremeDreamer" lol.
and bout the enviroment, cmon man.. bush is in office, save it. ;P
(more hairy than mulberry fairy)
and certainly less scary than any of the above.
less scary? fear isnt an emotion i bother with, so it dont make a difference. ;P btw, whats your take on Pina Colada Belle?