Free verse № 59924
The invisible man
'A rolling stone gathers no moss'
You blink, you fall- everything's lost
Our seventy brief years- on this earth
Time's worthless blink- you're not éven worth
For will they all notice- if you go
Will they care- you doubt so.
The invisible man- the mán's invisible.
But that's HIS point- it's not yours
You are here- and yet on tours
What is it
What have you got (leprocy?)
Maybe you should just turn to pot.
The invisible man- he wánts to be invisible.
People don't care- and yet you do
You're the one- supposed to coo
When théy're in the shit- you're that shitty-
Bottom less-
Pit.
You're sick of this shit.
You don't wana be that pit
No one seems to give a fuck
They walk on you- just like much
If you left to room- and came back
Would lines of speech- at all crack?
(Doubtful)
Should you not go in a blaze of glory
Does spec tacular- constitute glory
Guns and bombs and sex and booze
After all- what have we got to loose
Some band, you think- said it best-
'Nothingman.' Makes no difference to the rest
Like a leper
Kept away for ever
A bell for you- a warning for ever
'Nothingman'
5 comments
Lose the brackets you don't need them, leave that for the reader to decide. 7
Too much use of the word shit in stanza 3, otherwise its a grilled goose.
its good, one of your best, if not the best
2. tell me what your endgame is
3. tell me how far you want me to go.
z
my endgame is to express myself through words effectively
i would like you just to tell me what is really bad, what is good, and to rate them.thanks
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