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Return to Darkness... (Free verse) by loneshadow29
Truth strikes home once more Of loneliness everlasting Thrust deep into the tattered heart Of this lost and lonely soul So much pain has the shadow suffered Too much loss to bear such sorrow This lowly poet has fallen into shadow Once more, never again leaving His dark and final resting place No happiness shall ever find him Nor love ever to call his own Forever shall he lie in utter ruin Endless atonement within the hell Of his very own creation As the shadow lies grieving at his plight A prayer fills his tortured soul A prayer long since forgotten Begging for release from this pain From his unending suffering To silence those venomous voices And to end his agonizing heartache May death finally bring him home To the place where shadows roam Where he may finally find peace After an eternity of turmoil...

Up the ladder: On A Night Like This
Down the ladder: Duet

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 00
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Arithmetic Mean: 4.0
Weighted score: 4.880797
Overall Rank: 10055
Posted: August 3, 2003 6:18 PM PDT; Last modified: August 3, 2003 6:18 PM PDT
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Comments:
[7] Shardik @ 24.126.113.154 | 3-Aug-03/8:46 PM | Reply
Ah, yesss, pisss of mind.
[9] LuckyJoe @ 206.72.7.13 | 4-Aug-03/5:25 PM | Reply
Loving the vocab sounded like some of my own work. Didn't see any repeating words where something else could have said the same thing. (I hate poems that use the same word to describe something over and over) It was very good... but I had a few spots I had to read over because it didn't quite flow.
"fallen into shadow" end of line seven should be "fallen into shadows"
Here is a 9 keep up the good work and keep the pen on the paper flowing out languages unknown :)
[7] Shardik @ 24.126.113.154 > LuckyJoe | 4-Aug-03/6:03 PM | Reply
Would that said language be the language of love?
[9] LuckyJoe @ 206.72.7.13 > Shardik | 4-Aug-03/6:24 PM | Reply
It could be the language of love, yes. I was thinking more on the lines of the language of writing. Each new piece of work has its own language speaks in its own way and can often speak in ample amounts.
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