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Mistaken Paradise (Free verse) by DJCARTER
I stand with no walls or boundaries in my way My own personal euphoria, I have created to stay Foundations of dreams, made within my heart No man can take away, nor will I ever depart Memories of the past, which I've held within my soul Things I have loves, truly cherished, but never told An escape to a place, where I can love, laugh, and play A friendly reminder that my mind can still take me away I've forgotten mistakes made, and promises I've broken No ones here to judge me, until my eyes open For every hope, dream, and fantasy are all fake Life's true reality, I discover as I awake There's no distant plac for my spirit to be tamed It's the one true realization, that I cannot ever change

Down the ladder: Strange Days, Indeed

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 01
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10
.. 40
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 11

Arithmetic Mean: 4.888889
Weighted score: 4.9444447
Overall Rank: 9012
Posted: July 18, 2003 1:05 AM PDT; Last modified: July 18, 2003 1:05 AM PDT
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Comments:
[6] Terence @ 195.157.153.253 | 18-Jul-03/2:16 AM | Reply
A bit of a mess, but I like the sentiments expressed! The rhythm is rather jolting, like a nervous driver applying the brakes too frequently in heavy traffic.
[6] Jeremi B. Handrinos @ 24.126.113.154 | 18-Jul-03/4:19 PM | Reply
Gramaricaly abandoned.
[7] SupremeDreamer @ 66.81.159.53 | 18-Jul-03/9:47 PM | Reply
alas.. if this was written better, i would love it.. but im forced to bless it with 7, not higher.. ;(
[3] EAger to Offend @ 65.95.241.3 | 19-Jul-03/9:38 AM | Reply
This has missed my heart altogether.
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