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A Gordian knot (Some dirt on a friend of mine) (Other) by Bachus
You would be too, if they paid you for it, like how they pay him. Horus8, is a figment of some poor lost child’s mind on the plane of say Peter Pan. A defense mechanism gone horribly out of control. He doesn't sleep, doesn't eat. Rests fully clothed sitting or standing. Is fearless, Godless, and undeniably slightly psychic. A soul so old you can't shake it from your mind for days, weeks, sometimes forever. That one mutated gene that Darwin slept on for a lifetime. I've seen him enter a room and within 30 seconds be able to break the entire environment down into, I don't know, programs, formulas, codes of operating the room that he's developed to survive and entertain himself, even down to what spots are better to sit and stand in. Who to trust, who's dangerous, who he could love, who would love him, who's in control, who's not, what might happen if scenarios. I've seen him spontaneously bite people, blatantly imitate them to themselves, seduce, connect, humiliate, expose, enchant, hypnotize. Horus8 is strikingly scary at times, and other times the ultimate companion in everything. Once, I asked him how he did it (poet, father, teacher, writer, comedian, prostitute, drug addict, alcoholic, actor, singer, painter, sculptor, anthropologist, psychologist, historian, collector, director, producer, giver, taker, dreamer, elitist, Mason at the 33 degree) He stared at the wall as if he missed the question, then about two minutes later, out of no where, he says that he' d forgotten, there was a beat and then we just cracked the fuck up, but I've heard different rumors. Here's a short quick list I've compiled from memory. 1. His mother was raped by an incubus while he was gestating, or it was Immaculate Conception, but since he bears a close resemblance to his father, I would say gestation. Which myth has, increases the child’s awareness right out of the ballpark. Physically, mentally, spiritually. Giving the person a double nagual (Castenada term) type of energy and super natural presence. Lucky for him because no normal person would have made it, his childhood was utterly traumatic, and I mean to surreally ridiculous levels. The kind of shit that never happens happened to that poor bastard. He won't admit it and would spit on you if you did, but I think his appearance is as much to thank also. He has a classical Greek frame, but there's something strange about his face, and immediate looks. They are constantly changing, skin color, hair color, texture length, tones of voice and posture like a Chameleon or a Doppelganger. He tells great stories about clients (tricks) of his, from his days as a top drawer hustler, that would say "sure they know him well", but not even recognize him, say if they hadn't seen him in six months, even after sex, he says that's because they're just Neanderthals incapable of recognizing a tit from a turnip is all it boils down to, but I have my suspicions. 2. Those ridiculously surreal life experiences of his mentioned loosely above are responsible for changing him, you know, "what doesn't kill you blee blah blee" 'coal to diamond pressures'. Because, I can think of probably a hundred or more stories I've witnessed, or heard about, that if true, would mean he's a cross between James Bond with no acclaim or gadgets, and a young absorbing Socrates. No shit. What I do know is he was mostly raised by a Saintly soul by the name of Wanda, I believe his father's mother a ceramicist, after his father was incarcerated and he lost his little brother Joshua and the woman that he believed to be his mother, and loved more than anything, Lynn, because she went into hiding, and changed her name. I also know that he has not seen them since, but at twelve Wanda (his biological Grandmother and best friend, god rest her most blessed of souls) husband divorced her to marry some twenty year old bank teller, and claimed he went bankrupt. Sending her and him to live in a trailor park in SunValley, Nv. to be closer to her daughter his Aunt Kim, in Reno. He never graduated from school, but claims that's only because public schools were assinine and gave him sinus problems ( he had been in private schools), so he would skip class and hit the public library to listen to jazz and classical records and read.. Somehow got into the Navy were he was an intelligent specialist/SEAL, but something happened and he was thrown into Military prison for a year at like nineteen, or eighteen. I know that whenever I've asked for his help, he keeps his word, and drops everything to assist with no chiding. And that his mother was some kind of sadistic witch, literally. That abandoned him at birth, to his father, for a life abroad. Then at four, his father went to prison for thirteen years leaving him with his grandparents. Coincidentally, as fate would have it, out of no where his mom shows up and kidnapps him off to Hawaii for a timeless year, or one of those tropical islands. Whatever happened there was a big part of his hybrid nature, I can see it in his eyes when he mentions pieces of it, something so terrifying to him that he's completely blocked it off and barricaded it in. I believe that too, because I've seen him recall shit whenever he wants down to the tiniest of details, he calls the trick ' Scan, photo, file,' and claims that the human mind is capable of storing every minute of every day for a lifetime to refer back to at one's will, 'spontaneous recapitulating'. He has mentioned some pretty caustic moments in time with his mother, in paradise, while rambling in rant. He would amusingly use his, neither here nor there, demeanour, and attempt to laugh it off, but only he laughed, while others shifted uncomfortably in their seats. Here are a few. a. Would drive him randomly up into the mountains/rainforest (in Kauai) and tell him to find his way back home without being eaten by the boar that simply cherishes the taste of little boys. With the neurotic pretense of training him for some future earthly calamity or transfiguration. To shake the fear, not panic, and remember the path there in order to return, in other words pay attention always because you never know when you might find yourself off the beaten path and forced to adjust to a new situation rapidly. When she introduced the blindfold to the mix and more wild creatures is when it probably became more challenging. b. Tortured him physically and emotionally relentlessly for weeks and months at times, and then turn back into a loving mother with a finger snap, that would build him back up with kindness and gifts to a sufficient enough point for another lawful psychotic tear down. (better lawful than chaotic, right!) c. Told him lies and things no child of four should ever hear, dead or alive, no matter what the circumstances. d. Would leave him alone for weeks at a time to work on another island to fend for his self and attend school and behave as if she weren't gone, and she'd know if he told someone about her being away, and never come home again. Before her departures, a warning, that when she returned she wanted to hear in detail what occurred in the stories from the books she would give him to read to pass time. God only knows what those books were, but I would wager not Dr. Seuss. (I bet he made friends with the neighbors’ quick. lol) e. The unspeakable thing that follows a ring, the one late night in your ears. But this phantom won't sing, being a shadowy thing. So it sits on your chest and just leers. A demon of sound that lives underground that when heard can follow you home. An inorganic being that can leave a man peeing, his bed scared petrified numb. (Something he hummed to me on a drive when I asked him once about the worst thing he's experienced, he mentioned some thing or another about her tampering with entities & ritual magic that she shouldn't have been toying with, and making unfair pacts that were not hers to make, and that higher orders of {demons} [Angels] elemental spirits, when awakened, or aroused, can be vindictively troubling, and hold fierce grudges. Ruining you and your loved ones existence as you know it, terminally.) On a brighter, and different note though, I once watched him concoct a potion of invisibility/*future jumping (*dreaming the next day, or two, or week, who knows of your life before it occurs, well large chunks anyway) out of Dhatura Metel, and some kind of mushrooms, it was so fucking beyond my "hey sure why not man, lets get indigenous whatever happens, happens, attitude that I did it with" that I was never the same person again, really. The experience enlivened me, I was thrilled to be alive again yet more wary, like a little kid, a week later when we were discussing our experiences on a swing bench at a mutual friends about what we experienced while under the influence of the potion, I just kept saying to him "we're going to be fucking rich we'll change life as we know it!" Because, it was just mind boggling fanfuckingtastic, we would bet friends at parties that we could name specific unmistakable events during the night though sleeping in a sealed room while being observed by a neutral third party, and I'll tell you what "Supreme Dreamer", we made a killing, and freaked people the fuck out. To such an extent, it literally ruined relationships that we had with religious friends and straight edgers we knew because, it scared them stupid. I won't even go into what happened when you dreamed your future because it's just too profound, but I will say it's the Disney land of dejavu. Also I don't know what decides 'chemically' on an internal level whether you astro projected and cruised unseen amongst the present, or whether you "future jumped". All I can say is, I did them both several times to my complete satisfaction. But while on the subject, seeing the next day in my life, like that, on two different occasions was incredible because, here's the dusey, your reactive mind at a bio chemical level and rate immeasurable is fighting to convince you alls well and you're awake, aware, and waiting for it to happen (See the future), but nothing does, so you're like oh well, and you go about your business, you know, talk to friends, gossip, try to walk (which is difficult) and what have you. Then, next thing you know, you fucking wake up somewhere else it might be day or night, and you're disoriented as fuck, then you get your bearings as a friend who took care of you the night before laughs and tells you "Dude, I refuse to carry you around all night like that ever again, you're fucking too heavy" and you say how long have I been out and what happened, they tell you, all last night and all day, you both have a laugh at your hungover expense, but hey, wait a sec, there's a large part of the night missing in the conversation in your recollection, so you bring it up enthusiastically "Hey, what about when chuckie boy's leg caught on fire!", and they have no clue as to what you're talking about, they assure you that when you arrived at their house you did not go to any bonfire in their backyard and fall asleep in a chair talking to so and so and so on, they say, "nope, we carried you straight in from the car to this bed, period. You say, "shut up, dude I was in your backyard with da da & te ta we were talking about this and that", but you can tell this conversation has them a bit curious too, because what you don' t know and what they do, is while you were out the whole day in magic potion dream land, they were setting up to have a bon fire that very night, (well that's odd they think) and then they assume you must have heard them on the phone, but then you mention a very specific thing and KABOOM, you've struck a chord, and they react in such a way so odd that it literally was the first time I've seen a person look like that. A cross between hidden camera and seeing a ghost. Then you get up, refresh yourself, go into the back yard, sit down, and watch it all unfold same as the night before. In this case the specific thing was that there was a girl there that was from up north that only he knew was coming, no one actually knew her yet, but when I was telling him about the bon fire ( before it happened) I off handedly mentioned a girl who's name I didn't know from the U.P that kept calling me Jason, and I would say to her, " look I’m real loaded chicky on this magic potion right now, so bear with me, but for the third time it's Bachus, not Jason" then she apologized and said that it was just that her brother had recently died and I looked and reminded her of him, his name was Jason, and I could tell it weighed heavy on her so I told her no worries and nodded back off that's when he went twilight zone yellow, when I said that, I mean, he was totally floored, he went white and wobbled, the works. See, what I didn't know was she was his cousin, and he had invited her down to cheer her up, but since we weren't super close friends and he hadn't mentioned his cousin Jason dying or any of it to any one at all yet, when I said dead brother Jason, while cracking off the tale to him from the point of like "Hey, this will make you laugh, listen to this one bros." I felt the effect move in on him like he'd been nut kicked by an elephant, and to be perfectly honest with you, we've never spoken since. Regardless, sure as hell, I walked out of his back door. Sat in that same uncomfortable chair by the fire (this time before the wood was even lit), and watched the unbelievable happen identically as what I'd witnessed the previous evening, except, thinking I’d be a cool wise ass and impress her with my intuativeness. When she apollogized and said "you remind me of..." I finished the sentence for her "Jason" she broke down bad, and I felt like an asshole, I should have kept my mouth shut and gotten laid probably huh? Anyway, so as I'm giving horus8 all of the juicy details for him to scribe down on the bench swing, I say, "Let's do Ripley's, we'll be filthy fucking rich." He became deadly silent, and serious, and said that can't happen Bachus. That if I told anyone, unluckily, that was ' GOV' we would really disappear, forever, but the possibility of me bumping into a Kookie government agent bent on the carefully guarded botanical preparation and formula for the potion for evil diabolical purposes (pantsing Muslim Clerics mid Fatwah, could only happen a week after hitting the lottery while simultaneously discovering Brando was my dead beat dad, 1% of 1! in other words, so that was a plus. The other 99. 9 wouldn't hear it anyway, he assured me, "not even your priest or mom, " because they don't want to." So no matter how convincing I was or repetitive, they would just nod and smile, or ask a stupid question like "No shit, you got laid I hoped while invisible right dude?" or "That sounds scary honey, are you hungry?" and then pat me on the back and leave, and do you know what? That motherfucker was right. To this day I can tell some of my closest loved ones the story and they listen as if they've never heard it, and then forget about it that fast, I swear to red wine, it pisses me off to no end, and it's down right weird, but since that day it doesn't matter anyway because nothings truly weird anymore. 3. Cracked some secret Masonic formula out of one of his 'special books*' . Ritual magic 'conjuring'. *Greater Key of Solomon *The Lesser Key *to name the basics 4. Was abducted by Greys and switched at birth. 5.Read way, way too much, and is the luckiest bastard alive. 6. Ingested way, way, way to many hallucinogenic plants during his fieldwork altering his chemistry permanently. 7. Made it all up and some how duped 1,000 of acquaintances. 8. Is Tony Robbins inside source, and Kinney Kingston’s hair piece simultaneously.

Up the ladder: Goddess of the vineyard

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Arithmetic Mean: 7.5
Weighted score: 5.6723537
Overall Rank: 2017
Posted: June 23, 2003 5:08 AM PDT; Last modified: June 23, 2003 5:35 AM PDT
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Comments:
[10] SupremeDreamer @ 204.31.164.180 | 23-Jun-03/5:51 AM | Reply
Im.. not exactly sure how to answer as certain things mentioned act like a fucking mirror.. but this wont scare me, it only drives me insane into a task of getting to know you, wondering if perhaps that will be permitted..

You speak of seeing the future.. You speak of a boy that looks at a room and breaks it down into code (striking me with shock as i remember childhood memories) you strike at the core of my own name sir, suprisingly.. Now i understand.. yes, i do, for as i was signing up for this i had dejavu, i now remember the flash i had.. well man, with your potions you see into the void of what will be, but i wonder if you can see the whirlpools of time, chaos storms that have no cut clear result as to a persons fate.

I see without magic potions (hope i didnt take a metaphore too seriously)

I have only recently awakened from the chains of my soul and mind.. now i wonder what exactly you have in the name of dream to present to this mystics table..
[n/a] Bachus @ 24.126.113.154 > SupremeDreamer | 23-Jun-03/6:13 AM | Reply
No, but I can see my coffee maker, and that's about as metaphorical as it gets right now.
[10] SupremeDreamer @ 204.31.164.180 > Bachus | 23-Jun-03/6:25 AM | Reply
... im not sure if this was a joke, coincidence or if your just playing with me. any and either way, i doubt your going to make things easy.
[n/a] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 > SupremeDreamer | 23-Jun-03/8:35 AM | Reply
No, no joke, I'm exhausted. i've been writing about 6 to 9 thousand words a day for almost a year straight and my hair and nails have started smoking and glowing for no reason. So i'm either possessed, or tired and hallucinating, or both.

What would you like to know about me?
Well, before we discuss me, first, let me give you some advice.

1. I am not dark angel so don't ask if i am.
1.5 i am not mr. pig so don't tell me i am, please.
2. be careful because he(da) does have the language and talent at his disposal to run circles around you, so don't set yourself up, or me for that matter, in the process of you tripping around poemranker and getting to know the inhabitants. Lord knows some of our battles have left me vastly depleted and plum bonkers, not to mention lasting days on end, all hours, each second, every weapon the mind can contrive being hurled. I have met, counting on one hand, in all of my travels awareness levels to the extent of what he's capable of and let me glimpse, and let me tell you I've moved around, So since I'm in the middle of completing a new manuscript, I won't be able to help you, and you will be beaten like a 4 move chess opener with a nauseating new brass buzzer. I know that kind of sounds weird and all, but all i'm saying is I'm one of the most bionic minds and imaginations you'll ever come across. I never admit when someone's got a few up on me, because it's almost non existint in my spheres of movement, but then, one day that all miserably changed. The day I barked at that arrogant bastard, bot talk about stepping on a wad of hot gum on asphalt in August, Jesus, if I'd of known, I would've fucking just slept in that day. He Drove me fucking nuts for a bit sure, but the conflict forced my writing to anny up, and you know what, it did, and fast. So do yourself a favour watch him tango, you'll learn more than you think by telling him you can too. All silliness aside, I've studied his every move, and it simply boils down to a couple of facts.

comment contd.
[n/a] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 > SupremeDreamer | 23-Jun-03/8:41 AM | Reply
contd. as promised.

a) He's been doing it longer, better, and more consistantly than the both of us put together, me making up 80% of that combo if not 90% because any real poet could tell at a safe mile that you're still as unsure of your footing and style strengths poetically as the sun will rise in the morning. That alone is all he needs to make your life a poetic hellapaluza. About 9 months ago I was so obsessed over his ability to shift weight, press, let off, poetically duel that I would take his work folded up carefully out into the mainstream with me and force people to read it out loud back to me, out of the blue, shopping stores, post office, churches, restrooms, lol. Granted, when you're having a discussion with a well respected director of films or a producer and or fellow artist, and they say something that causes you to think of Dark Angel's poetry, that could well be a sign of some deeper more seriously rooted issues, but I trust my older mentors when they say. Yep, he's real good. In fact I think I've seen him only once mispell a word or have a typo, and I was not fully convinced it didn't happen purposely, and that's his entire collection of poems, comments, and debates, and to the casual poet that's easily snubbed as irrelevant old world poetry hang ups, but i'm talking about over a hundred thousand words here easy. Sure some would say I'm as careless and radical with technique, subject, and style as it gets, but that shit will only take you so far if smack dab in the middle of your latest masterpiece, one eve, as you're reading outloud to your guests after a fine dinner and your pipe. you find "And it was there's to begin with all a long" You think , "how'd i fuckin' miss that shit" And You see you have some good ranks and comments but no 9's or 10's? Hmmm bingo, the mature poet has all the time in the world to do it right once with no worries. While the young street poet is serving up eggs benidict still in a shell and calling it the breakfast of the future.

3. Form, now, I know what I'm good at because I've put myself to mastering structures as of late. This is the spine of all good poets my man. Vilanelles, freeverse, haiku, ghasels and many many others. Why, because as a songwriter myself by origin I figured out quick you have three minutes to say some clever shit in a different way that you practice infinitely, and hope you can work magic. Coincidentally, those structures mentioned above use that same back bone of poignant precise compression to work on the reader. Making them what they are damn fine styles. Work the hell out of every structure (style) you can find, even the ones you suck at, because you won't suck forever. Unless, you're not that quick on the uptake.

contd. again
[n/a] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 > SupremeDreamer | 23-Jun-03/8:42 AM | Reply
Now, as for me, the above piece is as honest and autobiographical as it gets. Meant to hand over to various interviewers of underground music and papers I'm associated with to leave me alone, and just print that. Because, some people are just impossible to sit in a room with for more than ten minutes. well everyone I know, practically. So if you don't trust the information, go boil the Dhatura root and add some shrooms and see for yourself. Bye, I'm off to an audition, toodles.
[10] SupremeDreamer @ 66.81.159.207 > horus8 | 23-Jun-03/9:18 AM | Reply
Well, I know well enough your not Dark-Angel (cmon.. do i seem that thick to think that you are??) As for what you mentioned, your right about him, I already made my mind to simply ignore him like I would ignore some Christian convertist. I believe what you said of your past, but I was confused as to its intentions. As for boiling up Dhatura and shrooms .. ;) I won't bother doing a entheogenic listing of the shit I've ingested/smoked/snorted.

Whats burning in my fucking mind is this comment from your knot:

I won't even go into what happened when you dreamed your future because it's just too profound, but I will say it's the Disney land of dejavu. Also I don't know what decides 'chemically' on an internal level whether you astro projected and cruised unseen amongst the present, or whether you "future jumped".

Deep in the insomnia that claimed me as a child I would have visions... see.. my mother who caused me and my father lots of suffering (another story) would go insane if she found me anywhere out of bed from when i was sent to it until 9 am or so... so I'd lay there.. staring, without a damned thought.. I'd drift as physical reality broke down.. mind you I didn't astro travel or future jump per se.. but I'd simply observe reality rewarping around me.. and what i saw once in one of these happenings is a chaotic time storm (what ive decided to call it).

It looked like a tornado of technicolor dots at first... then the dots became something like telivision screens where i saw places, people, heard talking, screaming, thoughts.. it captured and hypnotized me.. i dont have much remembering of these vision states, but what i do remember is profound enough. I traveled it to the deepest center of its tormenting whirl and saw what i describe as a tree.. laying out perfectly before me I later figured out it was time itself.. i saw my future... and i didnt fucking like it.. so what did i do.. I CHANGED IT, Rearranged it and redreamed the fucking curse.

But.. HOW THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW OF WHAT I DID LAYING TORMENTED WHEN FOUR? hrmm.. not even my closet friend, not even my blessed father knew of these things.. i sense though that my mother may have had a clue.. but you? you struck my attention at first with your clever comments on other poems i read, delved into your work and found an amazing collection. I usually sense these things more clearly than i did when i followed course twards this.. the whole time i discovered, joined, and posted on this sight, dejavu was more fucking intense than ever, and im wondering "what oh what father time lays before me that can be so profound as to prick my mind" first the ass-mask, it gave me some enlightenment.. but the knot.. was like an explosion.
[10] SupremeDreamer @ 204.31.163.241 > SupremeDreamer | 23-Jun-03/7:19 PM | Reply
I speak and ponder, yet no answers to my statements and question.. i wonder, if im talking to a wall...
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 131.111.8.96 > SupremeDreamer | 23-Jun-03/7:27 PM | Reply
He must still be at his audition. But when he gets back I'm sure he'll be delighted to read about the special spiritual bond you both share! Though be warned: he might be suffering from a recent bout of "Don't call us we'll call you" syndrome. Oh sweet, beloved Jesu! Why must an actor's life be blighted by a perpetual cycle of crushing failures?
[n/a] Bachus @ 24.126.113.154 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 23-Jun-03/8:00 PM | Reply
Wrong, I got it. Granted it's an infomercial for a spinning hairbrush with a plug that weighs about 15 lbs, but 2 grand is rent man, and it's only a day of work. Also, not getting jobs is as much a part of the learning process, as say when they hoist you up to check for bed sores and candy wrappers. It's all part of the process, which I accepted a long long time ago
[n/a] Bachus @ 24.126.113.154 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 23-Jun-03/8:16 PM | Reply
Just because you haven't written anything even worth mentioning in months... don't take your writer cramps out on me. I'm trying to work here, if you don't mind Mr. Maturity award with side of funless funyons and a Diet Dr. Pooper.
[n/a] Bachus @ 24.126.113.154 > SupremeDreamer | 23-Jun-03/8:06 PM | Reply
You are mistaking what all poetry should do for a connection all children at that age have. 85% of children are damaged at that age because of the rapid changes occuring, physically, mentally, and evironmentally. Try it, ask anyone what happened top them betwen the ages of three and 5, and watch carefully.
[10] SupremeDreamer @ 204.31.163.241 > Bachus | 23-Jun-03/8:19 PM | Reply
Ahh, but I have, and they don't speak of being plagued by visionary states and emotional and mental torture and suffering to such degrees. Rarely have I met such people cept a few, and some other extremely disturbing examples such as your piece up there.. i dont see a common pattern..
[n/a] <{Baba^Yaga}> @ 24.126.113.154 > SupremeDreamer | 25-Jun-03/6:00 PM | Reply
That's because I'm everything, everywhere, always, right now. Do you know who Dark angel is? I do. You know that Queen's of the stone age album? Songs for the death? Listen to the very end of song 13, it's a hidden song called. LOL! you will find it amusing, trust me.
[n/a] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 24-Jun-03/11:51 AM | Reply
Listen Bachus,

I know you mean well, but since people suspect that you're really me (not) this comes across as being just a bit conceited and creepy. Do me favor, please do not discuss my past without filling out the appropriate paper work for a proper license and waivers.

Thanks, carry on, drunk.
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