The Snowglobe

Member since 2002 · Posted 19 Jul 2002 · 3 comments

Up and down and all around her hand shakes the snowglobe. Snow that for years layed on the ground is now in midair drifting. Life that has slept within the town inside now makes snowmen with the white flakes. All has fallen, the town rests again never again to be woken except by anothers hand. Up and down and all around her hand shakes his heart. Feelings that none had yet found now overflow, for his heart had been ripped apart. Love that was stored deep inside now unvieled and has nothing to hide. All has receeded, the feelings rest again never again to be woken except by anothers hand.

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mean 4.00 weighted 4.73 rank 11803 views 164 View voting details →

6 votes so far. Yours would make 7.6 votes so far

3 comments

[8] forestchild7 19-Jul-02/3:18 PM Reply

sad but good...

[8] Sigh'ense... 31-Jul-02/2:08 PM Reply

Newness.

[2] god'swife 27-Aug-02/10:33 AM Reply

The writing is too simplistic. The comparison between the snow globe/heart is good, but you need more discriptive words. Use less of these words: again, for, had, has, that,the,was. These words are to be avoided whenever possible. For example: line 6- Makes white flake snowmen- can replace the entire sentence. keep trying.