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You wash up, I forget. (Free verse) by Bachus Drawing you a hot bath
I ponder displacement
of water and wash cloth
movements. Then I relapse as only
a drug addict can.
Tracing images on
medicine cabinet's mirror.
Heart and arrow forevers.
Bone and dust vendettas.
Spilling out of basin
climbing back up slick sides
When you arrive
I mutter something about
us needing, "new towels".
Then I retreat, back
to the front room.
Knowing full well
I'm a liar.
You motion me to join you.
I decline out of guilt and
fear and love and space.
My mind concludes
To much weight.
For such a short time.
Up the ladder:
A Cup Of Tea & Company
Down the ladder:
Being Here
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.0
Posted: May 6, 2003 2:20 AM PDT; Last modified: July 28, 2003 4:20 PM PDTWeighted score: 6.905148 Overall Rank: 229 Comments:
Confessional as always (if not of you of a character you created) but sharp enough to withstand it
Yep, as with your last few I enjoyed this one a great deal. Really well done. 8
I liked "I decline out of guilt and fear and love and space." The "My mind concludes/ To much weight./For such a short time." is confusing unless "to" is supposed to be "too" and there is not supposed to be a period after weight. But you are right, bathtubs aren't made for two.
the luminous drifting from room to room carrying thoughts in tow. ruminating like a fat hamster on a plastic wheel........waiting for the right moment to jump off. and who ever does.
giving inanimate objects life is so feckin' glorious. "medicine cabinet's mirror"...........all it was...was a comma but i felt my fingerprint on the glass. j.
I'm falling asleep.
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http://cabinessence.cream.org/BJ3-5a.zip
Listen to the first sketch after the intro.
http://cabinessence.cream.org/
This was very inventive and like I said, very funny.