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Waiting (Lyric) by Luv2write
Upon the distant shore she sits And gazing at the sky She wonders where her lost love is And if he?s passed her by The sunset falls and stars come out They twinkle overhead He?s all she ever thinks about He?s caused all the tears she?s shed Upon the distant star he waits Down to the earth he glances Imagines their meeting at pearly gates And future cloud-floored dances All his memories bring him pain And as a tear falls from his eye He knows she felt the drop of rain Descending from the sky A cool breeze blows after raindrops fall A sign of his embrace The clouds come in, no stars at all But someday she?ll see his face

Up the ladder: fire

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.0
Weighted score: 4.7310586
Overall Rank: 11810
Posted: March 12, 2003 3:33 AM PST; Last modified: March 12, 2003 3:33 AM PST
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Comments:
[0] lastobelus @ 217.226.20.1 | 12-Mar-03/12:18 PM | Reply
is your name Maud? just curious. Lynn?
[6] Sawa @ 12.229.220.155 | 12-Mar-03/3:23 PM | Reply
Trite trite trite.
[8] GekoHawaii @ 68.82.228.14 | 23-Mar-03/6:33 PM | Reply
mmm...yet again a great unseen twist. I like your style. It's out of the ordinary which is always a good thing. Great poem, but again there were a few minor meter difficulties that can be fixed fairly easily.
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