poemranker ::Dear Dad by liquidlama

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Concrete № 3740

Dear Dad

by liquidlama

Member since 2002 · Posted 9 Jul 2002 · 15 comments

How the f*** could you try and do that to you son; scream, slam and break doors and furniture and brandish a gun. Then turn around and say you love me. Somewhere inside somehow i felt it was true but love is gone and you're the worst monster when your'e on those spirits and brews. Stressful month on the job, have a few drinks. I can't ever forget the night you choked mom by the sink, I had to pull you off. On vacation, when you thought i was sleep, I heard you speaking of hos when you cheat. fucked up fathers is a family disease, like a tumor you can't remove cause it supports the tree. Times passed and we're gladly away, now when you call and say I love you its easier to reciprocate. Cuz we've had many great times and memories, Its better to love you from far away.

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mean 5.98 weighted 5.98 rank 1330 views 198 View voting details →

50 votes so far. Yours would make 51.50 votes so far

15 comments

[7] OneFingerAnswer 9-Jul-02/11:59 PM Reply
Good use of words but WOW. I hope you guys can get things together.
[4] nentwined 10-Jul-02/8:42 AM Reply
what shape are you going for with this?
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 10-Jul-02/9:30 AM Reply
My guess would be 'incredibly wide'.
[6] shwenatjadeflower 12-Jul-02/1:01 AM Reply
very angry
[8] horus8 12-Jul-02/5:15 PM Reply
Prestoa
[7] deleted user 13-Jul-02/2:06 PM Reply
lot of potential here because of the emotional honesty, but need to tighten -- relook some of your word choices to them more interesting/poetic.
[10] deleted user 15-Jul-02/4:33 AM Reply
I like your ability with words for this situation (i can relate, and was very touched) I felt your anger in link with mine...I think that this would also make great lirycs for a song..i love the family disease line...I felt my anger as i was reading your words(about my father)
[7] bluwiz 15-Jul-02/12:42 PM Reply
"fucked up fathers is a family disease, like a tumor you can't remove cause it supports the tree."
that was a great comparison. nice, a lot of raw emotion, but it could be better. not that it's not good already.
[4] -=SeTTle=- 16-Jul-02/11:03 PM Reply
Dark Angel, that's the funniest thing I've heard in a long long time. Call the tree doctor.
[8] horus8 17-Jul-02/12:37 AM Reply
So, let me get this straight. mention dad. Light him up. and win big votes. The Dad's of America better check in cuz by my score they're sunk
[7] forestchild7 19-Jul-02/5:23 PM Reply
good idea and use of language.. try and keep it skinnier... :-)
[n/a] liquidlama 19-Jul-02/9:56 PM Reply
Its more than an idea forestchild7.
[2] dilips_10 20-Jul-02/3:36 AM Reply
i didnt get a hand of it
[0] ciantu 21-Nov-02/4:58 PM Reply
too wide
[6] hipster flare 1-Oct-03/9:51 AM Reply
Has potential. work on the form.