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My sad life (Free verse) by Bobjim the II
I'm just sitting around Writing shit And drinking Too much beer When suddenly Too my suprise A little bug appears I try to swat it But miss it just And spill my beer On me So I decide To get the matches And burn the sucker Out Suddenly I drop the match ARGHH!! The beer is all over my trousers. WHOOOSHHH!!! And I start running, and screaming, 'Argh! My knobs on fire! AHHHHH! THE PAIN!!' So I run downstairs and plunge my meat and 2 veg into a bucket. (when I say meat, the only meal it represents now is penis brulee) And it's about then a little thought enters my mind: 'AH! FUCK! IT'S BLEACH! I'VE PUT MY KNOB IN SOME BLEACH!' So I yank my cock out, but the bucket falls over and splashes across the wall. The wall has a socket Shit 'FuZAAPPPP!OW!ShZZAPP!AH!AH!AH!' And somewhere in the middle of it all, I lost my sanity and started writing poetry for this site. It's been down-hill ever since. (Footnote: The surgeons only saved 15% of my knob, or 9 inches as I prefer to call it. I also got a DIY circumcision. And it hurt. Shit loads. Hence the bad attitude.)

Down the ladder: FIRETRUCK

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 4.5454545
Weighted score: 4.7727275
Overall Rank: 11370
Posted: January 6, 2003 2:30 PM PST; Last modified: January 6, 2003 2:30 PM PST
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Comments:
[5] cherish @ 68.51.210.55 | 6-Jan-03/2:33 PM | Reply
wow
[5] cherish @ 68.51.210.55 > cherish | 6-Jan-03/2:34 PM | Reply
that must have hurt bad
[0] Bachus @ 24.126.113.154 | 6-Jan-03/3:14 PM | Reply
Beer isn't flammable. nice frequency modulation. your poem and you are underbred. though. like the royal family. check the ears. thankgod for princess die's kids. hopefulls? carefor a bong toke? churble burble churble burble <brought to you by 'freefall' why bring a parachute? it will only slow you down, and 'birdshit' for your hat and your car>
[7] INTRANSIT @ 152.163.188.72 | 6-Jan-03/3:36 PM | Reply
Definitely funny!!
[9] Ranger @ 212.219.142.161 | 7-Jan-03/12:55 AM | Reply
Hnur hnur hnur.
You missed the bit where you fall over and it snaps.
And the bit where the dog thinks it's a sausage and...you know the rest.
Here's a 9 for making me laugh!
[n/a] razorgrin @ 192.197.142.155 | 7-Jan-03/9:50 AM | Reply
well, it does explain a lot.
[10] cleverdevice @ 212.219.142.161 | 20-Jan-03/3:11 AM | Reply
You sick twat.
[9] lunar @ 195.92.67.65 | 9-Apr-03/11:23 AM | Reply
This is funny!
[0] Edna Sweetlove @ 85.210.224.84 | 2-Sep-06/4:23 PM | Reply
About as amusing as a boil.
202 view(s)




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