Truth of the Moon

Member since 2001 · Posted 16 Mar 2002 · 3 comments

You wrote on my brain Can you erase that now? The curtain fell on my show, so I took the seat next to the moon. You used to talk to me sometimes? Problems, addictions, screams The passion of that vital force lived in solitude in a crowd. I made you stay with me as a servant to my cause. A ribbon around the tree of life guarding our only truth.

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16 votes so far. Yours would make 17.16 votes so far

3 comments

[n/a] nrevatehtni 16-Mar-02/1:21 AM Reply

the last comparison is weak. "a ribbon....guarding" not a heavyweight sentry. This doesn't hang together very well - perhaps the first stanza should be the last?

[6] anonymous 8-May-02/6:34 PM Reply

i like, a lot, except for the question mark on the first line of S2. keep writing!!

[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 28-Jul-02/8:29 AM Reply

God damn it why does every third poem I read make absolutely no fucking sense? Lines like 'guarding our only truth' are the fastest way to Hell, my lad.