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Fascination (Free verse) by ObiWonKn
She used to like to sit on the rafters and listen to me rehearse my lines, Monologues in an empty gymnasium Freshly polished hardwood floor My faded loafers squeaked when I walked and she?d giggle I?d pace back and forth, Memorizing her more than my lines The way comets burst from her eyes when I walked in front of her She said the words sound more interesting when they bounce off a hardwood floor She listened with intent, catching every syllable She seemed fascinated with the drama And I ? simply fascinated with her

Up the ladder: will you?

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Weighted score: 5.9820137
Overall Rank: 1328
Posted: March 16, 2002 1:18 AM PST; Last modified: March 16, 2002 1:18 AM PST
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Comments:
[4]... anonymous @ | 24-Jul-01/12:50 AM | Reply
very powerful imagery. I like it a lot!
[4]... anonymous @ | 24-Jul-01/7:57 AM | Reply
manages to net Life's elusive quality. First stanza is my favorite in its precision.
[n/a] nrevatehtni @ | 16-Mar-02/1:21 AM | Reply
manages to net Life's elusive quality. First stanza is my favorite in its precision
[4]... anonymous @ | 7-Aug-01/2:01 PM | Reply
"...comets burst / from her eyes..." would be a good comic exaggeration, but... ew! the literal mental image is kinda gross. I'm seeing blood on the hardwood floor!!!! :-)
[8] nentwined @ | 16-Mar-02/1:21 AM | Reply
reminds me of a scene in The World According to Garp, sorta. :)
[8] nentwined @ 66.92.183.34 | 12-Jun-02/2:09 AM | Reply
well put.
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 62.190.174.80 | 9-Jul-02/2:57 PM | Reply
Well that's certainly a unique experience! Perhaps you would like to share your experiences of other things nobody has ever experienced before? I'm sure you have some powerful things to say about unrequited love!!
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