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my body is a battle ground (Lyric) by roses are read
my body is a battle ground i call myself desert storm and 9-11, hoping that with names like that that maybe one side can win but neither does, so i twist deeper into myself and feel my blood cells swirling though the oxygen i am an owl hidden in the night with jewel eyes/buried in a treasure chest from a pirate who had a girl who loved him, but all he saw was the sea, and it was filled with dead girls, who had jumped in to try and find what he was searching for/they went down and found eyes like jewels, buried in a treasure chest and i can't find my way from inside the treasure chest so for now my body is a battle ground i call myself desert storm and 9- 11, hoping that with names like that that maybe one side can win my body is a battle ground a battle ground i am fighting

Up the ladder: Anger Management
Down the ladder: chuck

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.0833335
Weighted score: 4.329863
Overall Rank: 13080
Posted: May 19, 2002 5:08 PM PDT; Last modified: May 19, 2002 5:08 PM PDT
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Comments:
[2] necroscope7 @ 198.85.192.129 | 11-Jun-02/10:48 AM | Reply
Comparing Desert Storm with 9-11 is like comparing Vietnam with WWII. Desert Storm and Vietnam really had nothing to do with the American people other than trying to maintain our oil supplies, but WWII and the fighting after 9-11 are both, for America, anyway, wars fought to get revenge for and try to avert future large disaters visited upon the American people. What they have to do at all with the entire middle section of the poem I cannot personally comprehend.
[3] god'swife @ 67.73.29.240 | 3-Nov-03/4:49 PM | Reply
That longest second stanza is interesting but needs reworking, the rest should be thrown-out. Stick to the middle bit.
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