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puppy love (Free verse) by Freethinker1602
I'm a big puppy I learned to take food from your hand A problematic little puppy The Awkward runt I feel so terrible So sick inside, disappointed, betrayed Laying alone I trusted you, took food from your hand Now I wonder, has it turned or always been Poison? You chose me, took me in Made me feel so safe Gave me a chance When most saw no opportunity I feel so terrible So sick inside, disappointed, betrayed Laying alone I trusted you, took food from your hand Now I wonder, has it turned or always been Poison? My eyes were sad My legs were shaking So small and weak Yet a will to keep going I feel so terrible So sick inside, disappointed, betrayed Laying alone I trusted you, took food from your hand Now I wonder, has it turned or always been Poison? Funny puppy, silly puppy Learned how to stand Legs strong, getting independent Still attached, taking food from your hand So tell me now I'm lying here I feel like I'm dieing I trusted you I always needed you Now I'm alone, I can't find you Did you poison me, leave me to die alone? Did you abandon me as the rest of the world has?

Up the ladder: untitled
Down the ladder: under the weather

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.3333335
Weighted score: 5.1589375
Overall Rank: 5157
Posted: June 3, 2010 7:50 PM PDT; Last modified: June 3, 2010 7:50 PM PDT
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Comments:
[5] Dovina @ 68.183.220.26 | 1-Aug-10/5:54 PM | Reply
Its the way it goes when you feed a poor dog. He almost always goes bock to his self-pity wallow.
[n/a] http://mulberryfairy @ 76.24.243.64 | 29-Aug-10/9:27 PM | Reply
dieing=dying (last stanza)
in the first stanza, I think it should say "an awkward little runt" because in that stanza you are talking about yourself in 1st and 3rd person, and saying "The awkward little runt" sounds like another voice is saying it.
[6] nypoet22 @ 75.74.32.242 | 16-Sep-10/1:09 AM | Reply
sincere, if imprecise.
[8] Edna Sweetlove @ 85.210.10.118 | 24-Sep-10/4:49 AM | Reply
This is a delightful poem about a puppy, albeit with some grammatical errors. Why not submit it to my lovely new website: http://ednaspoetrysite.proboards.com ? I would if I were you...
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