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deluge (Free verse) by kawakurdi
Sail away with this crazy night Let silence rest in my soul Can you not see how the flames of water Have turned the lake of darkness into cascades of light? I sense your presence and serene sorrows settle in my heart I play my serenade beneath the window of your wounds. But I will not weep For you have rendered all my tears into rains of wrath. Hold on to the rims of this storm Wade through the deluge of this night Pour embers of anger from out of your eyes. Be assured my heart is an eternal hearth, My head is Kawa's hammer, And this scorched earth is the sacred ritual of Nawroz. Can't you smell the demise of the oppressors? Can't you see how they cling to the claws of the Devil? And inhale the smoke of his sighs? Can't you see how the gravediggers at the frontiers Graze on the news of my anticipated death And exchange their spades and shovels? So do not tell me You love death so much You don't finish one and start another." No, tell me You love life so much You die hundred times To live it in freedom.

Up the ladder: Black Hole Soul
Down the ladder: Musings from the LTD

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
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Arithmetic Mean: 5.923077
Weighted score: 5.6748233
Overall Rank: 2007
Posted: September 12, 2002 12:34 PM PDT; Last modified: September 12, 2002 12:34 PM PDT
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Comments:
[10] god'swife @ 209.179.135.185 | 12-Sep-02/1:43 PM | Reply
You come alive here. You seduce me with the beauty and the power of your images. 10
[10] god'swife @ 209.178.177.22 > god'swife | 12-Sep-02/2:01 PM | Reply
Please read my poem, Rose Of Jericho. I would be very grateful to hear your oppinion.
[n/a] kawakurdi @ 195.93.33.9 > god'swife | 12-Sep-02/2:57 PM | Reply
What do you want to bribe me now? Just kidding. I did read Rose Of Jericho and commneted on it.
[4] poetandknowit @ 65.101.212.179 | 12-Sep-02/8:39 PM | Reply
Like the beginning, especially the first line and dig the ending, but let out a big yawn in the middle. Maybe it is the adjectives you incorporate in your poetry that bother me, but then again maybe I just do not understand this type of poetry because of the culture I live in.
[8] royalflesh @ 64.170.52.79 | 12-Sep-02/8:57 PM | Reply
captivating ramshed of interesting and thoughtfull words. Impressed without disbelief. Knew you would pull through. In the wrench of the day the night doth fall hard and fast...so they say. 8/10
[4] pete @ 194.222.69.43 | 14-Sep-02/2:20 AM | Reply
imho the alliteration is overdone ..... 4
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