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Flour

Member since 2003 · Posted 6 Sep 2006 · 3 comments

A slender hand rests on the grave between headstones near and far . It is here I pause to construct my feelings --to bury something tangible , terrible . Is she dead ? Perhaps she is powder white to hide her rosy demeanor . Perhaps she is deader than ever ...my mind is a crowded one . Perhaps it's the flour she wears to catch her tears.

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3 comments

[7] Dovina 6-Sep-06/2:59 PM Reply

Yeah, I've been to those headstones, and seen that flour on her face. I've felt a mind crwoded with those thoughts. But I think the funky line ends and punctuation are attempst to shourd the impossible thing to say in poetic mystery, and it's easily seen through.

[9] nypoet22 › Dovina 9-Sep-06/1:51 PM Reply

i like the funky punctuation. it changes the way i read, and i think the meaning as well.

[8] half.italian 10-Sep-06/5:08 PM Reply

I love it. But at the same time the punctuation pisses me off. I don't think it adds anything more than a few characters in length.