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A Cripples Brittle Broken Bones (Free verse) by creepshow
A constant battle rages on, beneath the surface... Emotions of the vilest sense want to rise, tired of hearing their bold cries. I am realizing I am not you, nor am I capable of doing anything like you. You gave me this path, this predestiny. I am approaching the age of reason, conceptualize, not verbalize, rationalize, it is all in the name of displacement. For if I blame it on you, how can I feel guilty? Take pride now at the disgusting revelation of who I am, I look to the skies, and see my fathers eyes. Never will I again believe the earths putrid lies. My soul I thought was weak and brittle, but I have overcome as strong as iron, and sharp as a cleaver.

Up the ladder: Hide
Down the ladder: Subdued

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.0
Weighted score: 4.9525743
Overall Rank: 8827
Posted: July 30, 2006 1:32 PM PDT; Last modified: July 30, 2006 1:32 PM PDT
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Comments:
[8] MacFrantic @ 172.192.126.180 | 31-Jul-06/1:07 PM | Reply
A bit too busy here. The tense changes are a little annoying. However, the last four lines are outstanding and the concept is good.
[n/a] creepshow @ 66.41.134.109 > MacFrantic | 31-Jul-06/2:53 PM | Reply
Yeah, my thoughts were a bit rambled, but you apparently got the message. I appreciate your comments, and thanks for the vote.
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