poemranker ::fragment by ecargo

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Free verse № 144855

fragment

by ecargo

Member since 2002 · Posted 28 Jul 2006 · 5 comments

And so the fall, lost past its masters’ keeping, uncounted hours, sands bleed red sky’s stain. With dawnlight rockets’ screams comes women’s weeping, Another golden hour of the reign. Turn blindly to the blare of hollow chatter, the flicker-flash of eons come undone, a thousand rockets burst in evening’s leavings, a thousand hopes lie shattered in the sun.

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5 comments

[9] Dovina 28-Jul-06/5:18 PM Reply
I like the blare/Blair inuendo, if it is one - works for me. The "eons come undone" line reads as if some new thing is going on - new ways of doing it maybe. The thousand rockets equation to a thousand hopes makes it look like every rocket kills a hope, which is far from true. "past it's masters' keeping" shows the crude technology, and the rest shows how it is working.
[9] ALChemy 29-Jul-06/8:11 AM Reply
Reminds me of the days of the cold war.
[10] MacFrantic 31-Jul-06/1:12 PM Reply
Great meter. Just great.
[n/a] ecargo › MacFrantic 1-Aug-06/7:55 AM Reply
Just your basic iambic pentameter, but thanks. ;)
[9] Ranger 1-Aug-06/12:41 AM Reply
If 'blare' is meant as a pun, then I feel I must protest in the strongest possible way. Having been subject to his rule, I can safely say that his chatter is never empty. It is crammed to the rafters with bullshit.

Oh, and good poem ;-)