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My Culture (Final Version) (Free verse) by Wakeboarder20 Sex is a backbone.
Break it and we fall.
Babies are relative
thrown around, mistreated,
adored, and forgotten.
Welcome to my culture.
Reporting entertainment
while millions die.
But if it doesnât happen
outside our windows
it doesnât make the news.
Bleed and drown in magazines.
Perfect figure and image.
With a size of zero on the mind
little girls look for salvation.
Disorders, diets, and pain.
Bleeding through their eyelids.
Keeping it up at 90.
Thank God for little blue pills.
But deaths at 15
from the forgotten diseases.
That pill, well,
itâll come one day.
A culture of image,
reputation and value.
A culture big on loss,
ever so small on gain.
Not too blind to see hope
but too ignorant to seize it.
Welcome to my culture.
Up the ladder:
The Child in The Painting
Down the ladder:
Insomnia
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 3.0
Posted: June 12, 2006 9:11 PM PDT; Last modified: November 8, 2006 5:10 PM PSTWeighted score: 4.905148 Overall Rank: 9745 Comments:
[8]
nypoet22 @ 72.144.83.149
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12-Oct-06/6:19 PM
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Reply
the repetition doesn't really work for me here. when i read only the parts in each verse that come before "welcome to my culture," i like the poem a whole lot better. repetition of that sort is supposed to build you into a rhythm of some sort, and i think those parts are more of a disruption than anything else. i wish i could be more specific about what about those lines bugs me, but right now all i can say is that they make my brain itch.
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