Bad night out at jumpin jaks

Queueing to be robbed I ordered 3 buds and a red bull Gave the checquered eunuch a tenner And waited for some change As he waited for an extra 2 pounds fifty. Dogs barked in blouses At wolves dressed in sheepish expressions ‘you spilt my drink ya twat’ to which he replied SOZ At Chico time I thought Why am I in here? Why are they here? And why is my brother Dancing sexily to chico As a girl sucks the lime from his Sol So I thought I’d go for a curry But needed a piss first So walked to the gents But my penis was having none of it That would be cock shyness I was standing next to a well endowed black man So I went in to a cubicle Where I saw a jalfrezi Floating by a turd So I unzipped my flies And thought to myself I wont wash my hands I’ll shake the bouncers hand And thank him for a great night