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I think I'm forgetting it now. (Free verse) by FreeFormFixation
I tighten the line and I wade through the wake, then I'm tugged by a chariot plugged in the lake. A ghostship or maybe just motion sickness run amuck. "Sit still," says the tide, "and I'll pull you away on a ferry that's so snug and safe." The ocean's a coma of blue and I'll sleep til I slip out of view. Yet I must say, by far, this is one horrid trip; to be drug by a hook that is looped through my lip. And just as my last shred of consciousness slips, a face shoves its way through the fog. And I must say, by far, that finality stings. It's a loop on a leash that is hooked through my teeth. And just as my last silly compliment sinks my whole face is embraced by the fog.

Down the ladder: Old Friend

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.5
Weighted score: 4.976287
Overall Rank: 8290
Posted: June 6, 2006 5:46 AM PDT; Last modified: June 6, 2006 5:46 AM PDT
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Comments:
[9] Zoe @ 89.240.138.79 | 20-Jul-06/2:00 AM | Reply
This is really great. Some of the lines need to be pulled back to make them as tense as the others: 'And just as my last shred of consciousness slips'. But I enjoy the tone and rhythm of it.
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