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The Flawed Inventor (Free verse) by Caducus
I invented a pedestal
it was a flawed design
for she always fell
landing as a mannequin.
Then I dressed her how I wanted
through two brown windows
she saw her suitor
and fell again, breaking in two.
So I fixed her with my hands
re-inventing her,
I changed her face
moulding her, to suit my dream.
I invented another pedestal
it was the perfect design,
yet somehow she fell
landing as a woman
who left me
still as a mannequin
that left two brown windows open.
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 3.0
Weighted score: 4.905148
Overall Rank: 9743
Posted: May 25, 2006 1:35 AM PDT; Last modified: May 25, 2006 1:35 AM PDT
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Comments:
238 view(s)
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-L4S4: Very smart when looking at the aftermath in this 'story'
-L2S2: I recognize the "brown" of "brown windows" is repeated in the last stanza, but I don't understand the signifigant meaning behind the use of brown???
-Sunny