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George and Samson (Lyric) by Edna Sweetlove
My pet parrakeet George Has turned out to be gay; I know that this is true Because I heard him say To his cagemate Samson, (a parrot green and spotty), 'When old Edna's gone to bed You can fuck me up the botty.'

Up the ladder: My Father’s World
Down the ladder: Gemini

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.2352943
Weighted score: 6.23488
Overall Rank: 941
Posted: May 14, 2006 2:46 AM PDT; Last modified: May 14, 2006 2:46 AM PDT
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Comments:
[n/a] Edna Sweetlove @ 81.179.67.200 | 14-May-06/2:46 AM | Reply
Parrots have their feelings too!
[7] ALChemy @ 71.75.176.68 | 14-May-06/7:59 AM | Reply
It looses it's humor because you take the surprise out of the punchline.
Try an approach that is more like this:

Imagine my surprise,
imagine my dread.
A little voice whispers
at the foot of my bed.
"While ol' Edna's asleep-"
the little voice said
"-I'll give you some beak,
hurry up, go ahead
put it in my tail feather,
oh lord it's so large"
Only now did I realize
that the voice was George.
George my pet parrakeet
and Samson his cagemate
like to jailbirds in heat
buttfucking in their cage
Imagine my shock
Imagine my rage
two gaybirds are in
my bedroom engaged
in such an unholy screw.
Well, I was irated.
So I did what any
good Christain would do,
I watched them and masturbated.
[n/a] Edna Sweetlove @ 85.210.20.82 > ALChemy | 15-May-06/3:26 AM | Reply
I enjoyed your reworked version (in spite of its occasional grammatical lapses). Thank you for reading! I shall shortly repay the compliment perhaps in kind! xxxx Edna
[7] ALChemy @ 71.75.176.68 > Edna Sweetlove | 15-May-06/6:25 AM | Reply
I've only been in the south a year and a half and my grammar skills are dropping faster than George W. Bush's approval ratings. Looking forward to your next dirty ditty.
[n/a] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 | 15-May-06/5:36 PM | Reply
Having just borne witness to your incredible roundup of the limericks on here, the least I can do is leave a comment on one of your poems. And here it is:

This poem is a golden opportunity to rhyme 'Samson' with 'ram some'. I'll leave you to decide what was rammed, and where.
[n/a] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 > Ranger | 15-May-06/5:39 PM | Reply
And I had the unnerving feeling that you were going to include a line that ended with 'front'. Can't think what you might rhyme it with though...
[n/a] Edna Sweetlove @ 81.178.126.155 > Ranger | 16-May-06/5:19 AM | Reply
blunt. I've done a limerick.
[7] ALChemy @ 71.75.176.68 > Ranger | 16-May-06/6:17 AM | Reply
Or how about "Yun't" as in "Hey Jim Bob, yun't to go fishin'? -"I don't know Bubba, yun't to go huntin' instead?-
[n/a] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 > ALChemy | 16-May-06/6:55 AM | Reply
A fair point, although after poemranker I will always feel that Jim Bob is just a second-rate offering to Bobjim.
[n/a] Edna Sweetlove @ 85.210.184.228 > Ranger | 16-May-06/12:39 PM | Reply
What have bob jum and jim bob (who- or whatever they may be) got to do with my beautiful poem?
[10] Ulterius @ 82.46.97.41 | 31-Aug-06/9:11 AM | Reply
Brilliant. Parroty fun as always, Edna. Did you know that thirty percent of rams are gay?
[10] deleted user @ 87.74.45.126 | 31-Aug-06/9:29 AM | Reply
Nice gay parrot stuff.
[10] Sing4Jesus! @ 85.210.192.216 | 3-Sep-06/5:13 PM | Reply
Avian homosexuality is TOTALLY OUT OF ORDER!!!!!!!
[10] Engelbert Humpalot @ 194.154.22.38 | 4-Sep-06/10:03 AM | Reply
Delightful.
[10] Dr Toilet @ 194.154.22.36 | 15-Jan-07/8:55 AM | Reply
Dr Toilet likes this one as he likes things about bottoms!
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