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Once (Free verse) by xXxDemonicAngelxXx You once were the savior of the day.
You once took all the pain away.
Now itâs the other way around,
You used to here every sound.
You used to take all my tears away,
Now what there left to say?
Itâs now like hell here on earth,
To my happiness,
You once gave birth.
Up the ladder:
Brinkmanshit
Down the ladder:
Low Tide
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 4.0
Posted: April 3, 2006 1:50 AM PDT; Last modified: April 3, 2006 1:50 AM PDTWeighted score: 4.880797 Overall Rank: 10249 Comments:
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This is okay, not my style really but there are some good lines. 'You once were the savio(u)r of the day' reads nicely. 'here every sound' should be 'hear every sound'.
Too many cliches though, invent rather than take what you've heard before.