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Harp Song of the Prawne Men (Ode) by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
What is a prawne that you forsake him, When from his nest you greedily take him, Sever his limbs, his head, and then bake him? He has no trunk to keep a vest in-- But one top hat and tuxedo to dress in, With only the kelp and the sea to caress him. He has no strong white beak to peck you-- Just hundreds of legs with which to inspect you, Out on the rocks where the tide has wreck'd you. Yet, when signs of hunger thicken, And the surf breaks, and the ship lies stricken, Gravely you turn from the swell, and sicken-- Sicken again for a taste of his juices, You steal away to conduct your abuses, Down below deck where the head and the sluice is. You forget his wit, and the tendrils beneath him, His bed in the glass that you keep your false teeth in, And light up the stove as your bare hands unsheath him. How you yearn for a shipmate to share in your sorrow, But two beady eyes where a husk lies hollow Are all you have left through the months to follow. So what is a prawne that you forsake him, When from his nest you greedily take him, Sever his limbs, his head, and then bake him?


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Arithmetic Mean: 7.2
Weighted score: 5.2622466
Overall Rank: 3993
Posted: February 25, 2006 1:25 PM PST; Last modified: February 25, 2006 1:25 PM PST
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MacFrantic

Comments:
[9] Ranger @ 62.252.32.15 | 25-Feb-06/1:36 PM | Reply
Far and away your finest offering for a long while!
I myself pray that I never have to choose between life and prawne. And I pray to Jesu that the same applies to you.
[7] Dovina @ 69.175.32.104 | 25-Feb-06/1:51 PM | Reply
What was his name? You must have loved him very much.
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 86.135.203.170 > Dovina | 25-Feb-06/4:55 PM | Reply
Rudyard Q. Prawne
[n/a] INTRANSIT @ 69.33.49.194 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 1-Mar-06/7:57 AM | Reply
No! My name is PEPE! Get it right, okay?
[10] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 | 25-Feb-06/3:51 PM | Reply
Ya know, I ask myself that question every day.
[10] MacFrantic @ 172.184.226.227 | 26-Feb-06/11:16 AM | Reply
Magnifico! I love this. Ahaha. *sigh* *10*
[n/a] zodiac @ 209.193.14.134 | 27-Feb-06/11:28 AM | Reply
Do you have something sound and philosophical about the argument 'If I don't kill person X, he will kill me'?

The context is, obviously, Arabs. The person I'm arguing with is a loon, so it's not likely to make much of a difference. Hey, thanks bunches!

Tenderly,
Curious Hopeless Introvert in Alaska
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 86.135.203.170 > zodiac | 3-Mar-06/4:24 PM | Reply
No, but I can opine at length about the dangers of Islamofascism, and about how the dogs who printed those cartoons should be hunted down and punished for their crimes.
[n/a] zodiac @ 209.193.14.140 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 3-Mar-06/4:30 PM | Reply
If it's not about Asian virus cures, we're not having it today.
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 86.135.203.170 > zodiac | 3-Mar-06/5:19 PM | Reply
100 reversible black/white counters are in a darkened room. Call a counter White if its white side is facing up. Call it Black if its black side is facing up. You know that 90 of the 100 counters are Black and 10 are White. Arrange the counters into two distinct piles, each with the same number of Whites. (Obviously you cannot see the counters, merely fondle them. And flip them if you want.) [10 marks]
[n/a] zodiac @ 209.193.14.140 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 3-Mar-06/10:56 PM | Reply
I had to try this the ten most difficult ways before it occured to me to try my first idea, which of course was the simplest one and correct. I'm happy to say I haven't forgot enough maths that 90 & 10 didn't immediately suggest themselves.
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 86.135.203.170 > zodiac | 4-Mar-06/2:36 AM | Reply
You've solved it then? Excellent work! But don't reveal the secret here. Hand in your paper to captainshoehorn at hotmail dot com, where it shall receive a stern going-over.
[n/a] zodiac @ 206.174.124.170 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 4-Mar-06/9:23 AM | Reply
Done. I'd be interested in seeing the math for this, if there is any.
[10] ALChemy @ 24.74.100.11 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 4-Mar-06/7:56 AM | Reply
I've heard this one before except it was with a deck of cards.
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